Do any ladies agree?

[UnknownSld]

I didn't say that exactly. Just think of your current profile as a rough draft and you're making the revisions. We'll see what you can come up with and continue revising until you are successful.

I didn't make all the changes you suggest, did take out a few things which I agree had no place in there. Also, I took one of your paragraphs and revised it to fit the way I speak. Again though, thank you for the positive criticism. This is what I have come up with.

My name is Shane. I'm 26 years old. I'm a prior service Army soldier from FL, born and raised. Unlike most men these days, my parents taught me to respect women and my military duties shaped me into the man I am today. Though a leader in the military, I live a quiet, introverted lifestyle. I'm hoping to meet a nice woman someday, with whom I can share some of my passions. I would like to find someone who is into camping and she'd better like being outdoors, because every summer, I enjoy continuing my favorite pastimes; fishing, four wheeling, hiking. Brings back good memories of fishing with dad and brothers or hiking the hills behind our house when we lived in Maine.

The things I want most in life is to have a family and a good career. I would like to get back in the military if I can, but currently I am getting things worked out to go to the police academy. I have never been in any serious trouble with the law thank god. One day, I would very much like to work for a Federal Agency like the FBI or US Marshals. Time will tell with that one.

I was raised in a pretty tight nit family. We take care of each other as best as we can. Whenever one of us needs help or one of us is in trouble we try to help them out. Just like we do for really close friends. I was raised with manors and to treat people the way that I want to be treated. Even if those other people do not treat me in the same manor. I'm the kind of guy that will stop and help someone stranded on the side of the road, providing I am able to do so.

At heart, I am very much a romantic at heart. I like walks on the beach to talk, candle lit dinners, picnics on Sundays and even cuddling on the couch to watch a movie. I can be a bit clumsy which is fine by me because I will even laugh at myself. Every day I try to live by 7 values I learned over and over in the military. Loyalty, Duty, Respect, Selfless Service, Honor, Integrity and Personal Courage. Believe me when I say those have really helped me to become a better person.

A little more about what I like, well I love music, art and sports. I have been drawing since the sixth grade and I am fairly good at it. If I can draw peoples portraits, that has to count for something right? Music, well I listen to just about everything accept for mexican, polka, opera, techno and pop music. Most of the time you will catch me listening to country or hip hop. Generally I like music that I can relate to in one way or another or something that just has a good beat that I can actually understand. Football and mixed martial arts are my favorite sports but I will play just about any sport.

Anything that gives me a good work out and lets me have fun is great to me. I also enjoy paint ball and go kart racing. So if you like any of these activities we could get alone pretty well. Maybe we can even spend a day at Grand Prix in Tampa. Other activities I enjoy are relaxing at the beach or watching a movie. I like kicking back and having a few beers with close friends and loved ones around a bonfire.

I love learning about just about anything I can learn. History was one of my favorite subjects in school, especially military history. Over all I am a pretty easy person to get along with and a good person at heart. I do not play games, cheat, lead people on or use them. Anything that I want, I go out and earn it for myself. So basically this is me, take it or leave it. That is all up to you, but good luck if you decide I am not the right one. Even if I may not be, couldn't hurt to make a new friend though, right? It's in your court now.

[bloodtippedrose]

We are all guilty of judging a book by its cover. If I was to judge you by your avatar, like the other girls I would guess that you (UnknownSld) are arrogant and self absorbed, possibly a guy who had nothing going for him after high school so he resorted to the army. Now instead of defending yourself with examples of how you do NOT fit that criteria, I suggest you take in those comments and possibly work on changing your appearance to how you want to come off to people. Your picture is your first chance to make an impression, and if it is not projecting the kind of man they're looking for then they will not read your personality profile even if it is GOLD.

Look at my avvy for example, its halo so ppl think Im a guy but my username conflicts with that so it intrigues some people to figure out if Im a chick, they might think Im a gamer girl, they might think i can "hang with guys" or they might think Im a total geek, all of these things would attract the kind of person I would like to have a conversation with.. a geek. Cuz geeks are fu#king sexy! Then they could wander to my profile to find my pics or more about me. Basically you must take advantage of peoples first impressions to make the kind of girl youd like to get to know stick around and find out more about you!

[warriormaiden]

Generally, I find that the men that I'm attracted to, we don't have too much chemistry, and it's just boring and lifeless. Lack passion.
I'm more attracted to personality, I find. It's strange. Not that I DON'T consider a guy's look, it's just not that big of a thing for me anymore.

I love a guy with some brains. There's nothing sexier. Makes me quiver.

[UnknownSld]

We are all guilty of judging a book by its cover. If I was to judge you by your avatar, like the other girls I would guess that you (UnknownSld) are arrogant and self absorbed, possibly a guy who had nothing going for him after high school so he resorted to the army. Now instead of defending yourself with examples of how you do NOT fit that criteria, I suggest you take in those comments and possibly work on changing your appearance to how you want to come off to people. Your picture is your first chance to make an impression, and if it is not projecting the kind of man they're looking for then they will not read your personality profile even if it is GOLD.

Look at my avvy for example, its halo so ppl think Im a guy but my username conflicts with that so it intrigues some people to figure out if Im a chick, they might think Im a gamer girl, they might think i can "hang with guys" or they might think Im a total geek, all of these things would attract the kind of person I would like to have a conversation with.. a geek. Cuz geeks are fu#king sexy! Then they could wander to my profile to find my pics or more about me. Basically you must take advantage of peoples first impressions to make the kind of girl youd like to get to know stick around and find out more about you!

What about my picture gives off the impression that I am arrogant and self absorbed or that I had nothing going for me after high school? I chose the army because I wanted to challenge myself not to mention the fact I wanted to follow my fathers footsteps. Also, it looks great on law enforcement applications. But what kind of picture should I put as my main picture that would be more appealing?

Generally, I find that the men that I'm attracted to, we don't have too much chemistry, and it's just boring and lifeless. Lack passion.
I'm more attracted to personality, I find. It's strange. Not that I DON'T consider a guy's look, it's just not that big of a thing for me anymore.

I love a guy with some brains. There's nothing sexier. Makes me quiver.

I think your the first person to be honest without being condescending about it. Kudos to you.

[xxazurexx]

There is a reason I do not take close up pictures. Simply put, my close up pictures do not look very good because I have had acne and blemishing problems since I was about 10. My teeth are not perfect either. They are not rotten but they are gapped and one is chipped from a fight I was in as a kid when 3 kids jumped me. Again, that is part of the reason I want to get a little more into shape. One of the last girls I actually got to go on a date with me pulled out of the driveway as I went to lock up the door. She sent me a text later and said the reason why she left was because I was not as good looking as I am in my pictures. Here is this close up good enough?

I didn't get to see the photo, page expired...

For the reason she pulled away in the car, is why you should try and show more close up pics. Women will know what to expect and you won't get that type of shit happen anymore.
I'm not saying have all your pics close up, just a couple of them. And why not consider having your pics slightly airbrushed and to remove any blemishing? There are tons of software downloads you can find on the web and that improve a portrait photo...it's not like you are deceiving in altering your facial features....just airbrushing the skin slightly.

Like Take2 says, online dating is a numbers game and there is a lot of competition. Competition that we don't get nor have in real life. It's far easier to meet someone in real life I think.
In the whole of the 3 years that I frequented a chat site, I only ever met 1 guy in real life and there was another 2 guys I'd planned to meet, but it didn't happen. Waste of time IMO and I will stick to real life.

[UnknownSld]

I did have close up pictures of me when her and I started talking. It was because of her that I took them down. As far as those programs, the only ones I have found so far are ones that I have to pay for or have limited use on with the trial version. I agree thought that online dating is a numbers game, one I am obviously loosing lol. But as far as real life goes, I honestly do not know how to approach a female much less what to say. Even when I say something that interests them, as soon as a better guy comes up the start ignoring me. Thats why I don't go to clubs to meet girls anymore haha.

[misombra]

Maybe you can get one of those books on how to get girls like pua or something.

[Take2]

UnknownSld, I can give you another piece of advice. You seem to be angling for an intellectual girl, right? Intelligence is very important to you? But you have typos like "tight nit" family and "the things is." If you wanted a party girl, no problem, as grammar isn't super-important to a whole lot of people. But if you want to paint yourself as a bright guy and look for a bright gal...you have to pay REALLY close attention to your profile looking for possible errors like that.

Also, while there is nothing wrong with your career history or goals...your description of them doesn't work them to best advantage. It sort of sounds like you were discharged from the Army against your will, are currently unemployed and hoping the Army or the police academy will let you in one day? If that is the case, leave those details out. If that isn't true, you might need to re-work that part of your write-up.

[xxazurexx]

I did have close up pictures of me when her and I started talking. It was because of her that I took them down. As far as those programs, the only ones I have found so far are ones that I have to pay for or have limited use on with the trial version. I agree thought that online dating is a numbers game, one I am obviously loosing lol. But as far as real life goes, I honestly do not know how to approach a female much less what to say. Even when I say something that interests them, as soon as a better guy comes up the start ignoring me. Thats why I don't go to clubs to meet girls anymore haha.

So which age group of females are you targeting? Some younger women tend to be fickle, turning their attentions from one guy to another and as often as they change their underwear and because I guess they can and if they get lots of attention.

If you have trouble approaching females and feel you lose them as soon as some other guy shows up, I'm thinking you need to work on your confidence.

[girl68]

What about my picture gives off the impression that I am arrogant and self absorbed.

You know how you see blondie with lots of makeup and you automatically assume she's a dumb attention whore? Well it's the same thing when I look at your picture. Oh psssh, loser with muscles/ roidmonkey (or however you want me to phrase that). You may or may not be cocky, but you sure as hell give that impression off in that pic. It's merely judging just like you have judged the barbies.

[UnknownSld]

UnknownSld, I can give you another piece of advice. You seem to be angling for an intellectual girl, right? Intelligence is very important to you? But you have typos like "tight nit" family and "the things is." If you wanted a party girl, no problem, as grammar isn't super-important to a whole lot of people. But if you want to paint yourself as a bright guy and look for a bright gal...you have to pay REALLY close attention to your profile looking for possible errors like that.

Also, while there is nothing wrong with your career history or goals...your description of them doesn't work them to best advantage. It sort of sounds like you were discharged from the Army against your will, are currently unemployed and hoping the Army or the police academy will let you in one day? If that is the case, leave those details out. If that isn't true, you might need to re-work that part of your write-up.

Yes, I would prefer someone who is intelligent rather than a party girl. My previous girlfriend was a party girl and constantly cheated. I am not the best speller, sometimes type to fast and miss little things like that so thank you for reminding me to keep a closer eye on spelling and grammer.

As far as the Army, I was medically discharged due to an injury. I have a job and I have been accepted to the police academy, just need a way to pay for it. Currently I will not have enough money to pay for it till next year.

So which age group of females are you targeting? Some younger women tend to be fickle, turning their attentions from one guy to another and as often as they change their underwear and because I guess they can and if they get lots of attention.

If you have trouble approaching females and feel you lose them as soon as some other guy shows up, I'm thinking you need to work on your confidence.

I generally look for girls between the ages of 22 and 26. I try not to go for girls who are more than 4 years in age difference, younger or older. My confidence is part of the reason I work out although, unlike what girl68 seems to think, I am not a "roidmonkey" as she put it. As I have said before, I was always the skinny kid who was beat up in school, at least until I started working out and gaining a little bit of muscle. I still to this day get picked on by some of my friends, although since I have started going back to the gym they don't do it as much anymore.

[Sonrisa]

^^^ intelligent girls don't go for losers. they go for intelligent guys.

[doppelgaenger]

Yes, I would prefer someone who is intelligent rather than a party girl. My previous girlfriend was a party girl and constantly cheated. I am not the best speller, sometimes type to fast and miss little things like that so thank you for reminding me to keep a closer eye on spelling and grammer.

As far as the Army, I was medically discharged due to an injury. I have a job and I have been accepted to the police academy, just need a way to pay for it. Currently I will not have enough money to pay for it till next year.

GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Seriously?

[vertical_sky]

I am coming late to the game, but for me personally, sometimes I don't respond to messages not because the guy isn't attractive, but because there just aren't enough hours in the day (and I still have hopes of an ex, but that is an entirely separate thread.)

That isn't to imply I am all that and a bag of chips.... I've just observed that guys on average are a lot more flippant about sending messages. I have SO many messages in my inbox from guys who write nothing except "Hey." That's it... just "hey." Or "Your cute." (Huge personal turn-off: being unable to differentiate between you're and your.) Even when I delete these messages without opening them up, it's still a time waster. Then there are the messages from guys who don't pass my filter... for instance, on OKCupid, they 1) live outside the area I specify 2) are older than what I stipulated I like and 3) are a 60% match with me on a good day. And yet they still message me! That says to me they don't actually like ME, they're just a message-sending machine to anything that says "female."

Unfortunately, the messages from guys I AM well matched with AND I find attractive get lost among all the awful. Sometimes I'm able to dig them out, but sometimes I don't check my mail for a month, and then only have the energy to respond to the top 5 messages (AFTER cleaning up all the junk.)

So it has absolutely nothing to do with physical attractiveness, and much more to do with having to wade through the messages of muck from guys who think online dating = desperate = I don't have to try = easy hookup!

That said, if a guy's photo is off, his profile has to be pretty darn amazing for me to respond. When I say "off," I don't necessarily mean physical attractiveness.... I mean 1) he stands super far away from the camera 2) all of his photos are from bars and parties 3) his main photo or most of his photos are him with his arm around a gorgeous woman (even if she's your sister, crop her out.) 4) He's striking a "bro" stance/gesture.

Photos that will immediately enhance a guy's physical attractiveness: 1) Him with nieces or nephews (in my deep insecure moments, I was jealous of how my ex lavished so much attention and love on his niece, but DAMN if they weren't absolutely adorable together) 2) travel pictures 3) doing an interesting hobby 4) doing something nerdy/funny (I saw a guy's profile back in October where he was dressed as Darkwing Duck. I messaged him THAT INSTANT.)

A good photo is one that enhances your physical attractiveness by bringing out your personality.

[Sonrisa]

nerdy you say.....is this nerdy enough: