Creepy?

[Cain]

can you find her in myspace? or facebook, just add her there, to keep trying is a bit ott, its meant to be casual right?

The girl I'm trying to call? I've said this numerous times in the thread that she isn't listed in any of them.

[ecojeanne]

well at this point i would just leave it tbh

[Gribble]

I don't know what some of the others are smoking but this isn't creepy in the least. Nothing wrong with looking up old friends. I'd love it if a girl (who wasn't batshit crazy) from the 8th grade got in touch with me again. It'd make me feel damn special that someone remembered all that time. No doubt your girl would feel the same.

[ecojeanne]

ye but don't you think at this point, you made the effort, tbh it is crossing the casual 'oh just rang to catch up' line to going out of your way to get in contact. i think if i found out someone contacted one of my friends to get in contact with me...ye i would wonder at his intentions coz he went to a lot of effort. i don't mind a call or letter in the post, but more than that is too much imo

[Cain]

I'll probably give her another call in a week or two. I still would like to see how she's doing.

I was nervous calling that time, so it's good she didn't answer. It'll be easier the second.

[lastwish]

People are always telling this and that is creepy. But WHY exactly is it creepy, how and what? What would you think? I amso one of those types who don't understand this stuff.



As for Cain. In my opinion, if you have the gus just tell her you found a yearbook and as looking it thought how everyone is doing so far.

It's creepy because he hasn't kept in contact with her in 10 years. Its not like he's family. And plus, if someone knows your home number they might know where you live (by seaching on yellow pages). They can track you down.

Some people just find it creepy and she might be one of those people. I think its safer to add her online first before calling her if he can.

[boobaa]

Lol, this reminds me an instance few years ago how I found out where my crush lives via phone book. It was just out of curiosity. Anyway, I met a guy I became friends with, and it turned out he was her neighbour. He had a job to offer and I ended up putting fence in her garden. This was all very odd, that is fate. But she never found out I was there though, she was on a trip appareantly at that time.

[Cain]

It's creepy because he hasn't kept in contact with her in 10 years. Its not like he's family. And plus, if someone knows your home number they might know where you live (by seaching on yellow pages). They can track you down.

Some people just find it creepy and she might be one of those people. I think its safer to add her online first before calling her if he can.

If someone was that eager to avoid someone knowing their home address, they wouldn't be listed in the phone book. It is possible, you know, to be unlisted.

If she finds it creepy, she's obviously not the kind of person I'd want to be friends with anyways. I was given notes that she wrote me that caused me to wonder how she's doing. I didn't hire someone to find her. I didn't stalk her. I spent two minutes running a search of her name in the phone book. Same city. Same name. It took literally no effort. If that is creepy to her, oh well.

[lastwish]

If someone was that eager to avoid someone knowing their home address, they wouldn't be listed in the phone book. It is possible, you know, to be unlisted.

If she finds it creepy, she's obviously not the kind of person I'd want to be friends with anyways. I was given notes that she wrote me that caused me to wonder how she's doing. I didn't hire someone to find her. I didn't stalk her. I spent two minutes running a search of her name in the phone book. Same city. Same name. It took literally no effort. If that is creepy to her, oh well.

ok...

Well, if you don't think she's worthwhile because she finds it creepy that someone will look up her phone number after 10 years of non contact then go ahead and call her. Do as you wish.

I'm just telling you...some people do find it creepy, not neccessarily because they don't like you but they're not used to be called out of the blue from someone who haven't talked to her in 10 years. Just don't want you to ruin your chances. But do as you wish...maybe she'll be thrilled.

[boobaa]

Just tell her you are doing check up on old friends, thats all.

[Cain]

ok...

Well, if you don't think she's worthwhile because she finds it creepy that someone will look up her phone number after 10 years of non contact then go ahead and call her. Do as you wish.

I'm just telling you...some people do find it creepy, not neccessarily because they don't like you but they're not used to be called out of the blue from someone who haven't talked to her in 10 years. Just don't want you to ruin your chances. But do as you wish...maybe she'll be thrilled.

Maybe the word you're looking for isn't creepy then. Weird? Sure. Creepy? No. I look at creepy as if I put forth a ton of effort to find someone I haven't spoken to in 10 years. Or if I stalked her. Or if I dug through her trash to find out what magazines she liked.

[Dasein]

ye but don't you think at this point, you made the effort, tbh it is crossing the casual 'oh just rang to catch up' line to going out of your way to get in contact. i think if i found out someone contacted one of my friends to get in contact with me...ye i would wonder at his intentions coz he went to a lot of effort. i don't mind a call or letter in the post, but more than that is too much imo

Eco this is OT but why do you write "ye"? Is that an Irish thing?

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Lastwish, I think you are blowing it out of proportion. It's not that serious. You're being very pessimistic about the situation. I understand what you're trying to say but what Cain has done is not nearly enough to label him as creepy. And yes, if she were to call him creepy just for finding her phone number where she allowed to have it herself then she'd not be worthwhile.

[lovesjoyajm]

Maybe the word you're looking for isn't creepy then. Weird? Sure. Creepy? No.

That's what I was going to say. Quaint, unexpected, surprising, yes. Not creepy.

My mom told me 2 months ago that a girl I knew 10 years ago lives in the same German city as me. We played together in a string quartet at summer camp when I was 12 or 13. My mom knows the girl's aunt but I hadn't seen her since then. She sent me the girl's contact info, I sent her an email saying "...remember me? we should have coffee." Now we see each other all the time, cook together, hang out together. And it's always a fun story when people ask "so how do you know each other?" "...well..."

Of course, the fact that it's a guy and girl in your case adds another dimension, but I think if you approach it as more "nostalgia", she'll definitely appreciate it. Don't worry, just do it!

But I mean, if all else fails, you could always add her on Facebook.

[ecojeanne]

cain do you always over analyse everything?!

this subject has imo become weird tbh. it was happy and lighthearted at the beginning of the discussion but the more you talk about getting in contact the more it seems that you have another agenda and you seem ott about it. do all guys think like this about such minor things?

i would have dropped it at the call. end of.