Should I end my relationship??

[Mish]

You know that this relationship will come to an untimely end anon. If you are looking for a partner who is more permanent then you might be wasting your time with this fellow. The more time you spend with him the harder it will be to let go when things will need to end.

[CocoChanel]

Exactly. Me of all people consider break ups as the last resort... I believe in trying everything before calling it quits. In this situation I think she really needs to withdraw a bit. You in love with him, he's in love with you, he's still growing, you are full grown, the honeymoon phase is over, you want more commitment and he is content. This is a disaster waiting to happen.

[anon40]

I agree with some of the comments you have all said (Seganomics,Cocochanel & Mishanya ) but all I can say is that I am no longer looking at this relationship as a 'longterm relationship'.

Over the last few days my feelings have changed slightly towards my partner and I know that the relationship is not for 'keeps'......I do love my partner but not sure if im 'In love' with him........we had a big bust up over the weekend and I'm not sure I can recover from it.

I suppose I now know what I have to do, but it's so hard.

[blackbird]

hi anon40...i can relate to your situation....i'm in a similar one myself and trying to figure the best way forward for me.....it's certainly a tough decision!

[anon40]

Hi Blackbird, I'm so glad someone else is in a similiar situation to my own. I just feel like no-one understands how I could be feeling at this moment in time.

I'm finding it so hard to break up with my partner - as I still love him.

Have you thought about your situation and what you will do?

[blackbird]

Hi Blackbird, I'm so glad someone else is in a similiar situation to my own. I just feel like no-one understands how I could be feeling at this moment in time.

I'm finding it so hard to break up with my partner - as I still love him.

Have you thought about your situation and what you will do?

i haven't considered what i will do.....my partner is a great guy with many good qualities......and i really enjoy his company.....although he is younger, he is quite mature on an intellectual level so we really hit it off when having deep conversations.....

like you, i live a far distance from my partner so don't see him as regularly as i'd like.....it certainly creates a stress as it is either feast or famine.....either we don't see each other for several weeks, or when we do, we are living in the same house for a few days which can be too much at times.....

part of the problem is myself....i need to make a change within me.....i have always been a "people pleaser" so get hurt on some level when it is not returned.....i have to learn to look after me first and i think it'll make me happier in all relationships, whether it be friends or lovers.....

[CocoChanel]

I agree with some of the comments you have all said (Seganomics,Cocochanel & Mishanya ) but all I can say is that I am no longer looking at this relationship as a 'longterm relationship'.

Over the last few days my feelings have changed slightly towards my partner and I know that the relationship is not for 'keeps'......I do love my partner but not sure if im 'In love' with him........we had a big bust up over the weekend and I'm not sure I can recover from it.

I suppose I now know what I have to do, but it's so hard.

Just be careful that's all, with your heart and your feelings.

[anon40]

Blackbird, I too am a 'people pleaser' and I also get hurt and take it to heart when the feelings are not reciprocated.

I guess we will both come to a decision which we think is right and best for our situations.

Good luck, I hope everything works out well for you.

[anon40]

Cocochanel.......I have also taken some of your advice and will actually have some time apart from my partner.

Atleast that will give me time to seriously think about all the issues in my relationship.

[anon40]

ok, I have now ended the relationship as I just felt it was the right thing to do but I feel so lonely now, it hurts like hell not to be with my partner anymore.

How do I get over this...I feel so heartbroken (even though I ended it)?

Remember, he was not only my boyfriend but my friend as well.

Why do I feel so bad (when I know it was the right thing to do)? I just hope I get over this soon as I'm having sleepless nights and my apetite has gone.

[Gigabitch]

Oh, honey, I know. It's so effing hard. It leaves a hole in you that can take ages to heal.

The last time I went through that kind of breakup I moped in the house for about three months, only leaving to go to work. Eventually, one of my girlfriends said enough was enough and dragged me out to a party. I'm sure I was no fun, but eventually I got my balance back and started to move forward. You will too.

[ecojeanne]

Duh. He's just a kid!

Yeah, it was fun... but hasn't it already ran it's course?!

Farewell to the youngin' find a guy who's a little older a little more mature.

duh he's not a kid. he's fckin 28. he's reaching 30 soon. he's old enough to make decisions for himself without influence and therefore there may be an age gap but it's psycologically a lot closer than a 21 yrs old with a 30 yr old. get a grip here. he's no kid.

girl what age are you?

[anon40]

Thanks Gigabitch - I really rate your opinion because although you are slightly harsh with your comments you are usually right so thanks for all the advice you have given me and yes, although it hurts like hell - I know in time, things will get better.

[anon40]

To Ecojeanne...I am a 40 year old woman, so should have known better - but as they say, you can't help who you 'fall in love' with.

[anon40]

By the way Ecojeanne - I agree with you on the 'kid' thing - he certainly was no kid at the age of 28 and was very mature for he's age.