Anger management

[confusius]

This damaged my relationship . My ex told me I was perfect EXPECT when I get angry!
I really need to work on this if I ever want to feel happy in a relationship again. This make me skeptical about getting in another relationship because I don't want it to happen again. I have been talking to a counselor. Next week will be my last session and I don't feel comfortable about it. So anything you guys have about this subject let me know. I really want to be happy in my next relationship I need this. I lost who I thought, and still sorta think so, was the love of my life that's one of the worst feeling in the world.

[Sonrisa]

i guess it's best to leave the room when you get angry and think about the situation rationally and only then address it

[VincenzoG91]

i guess it's best to leave the room when you get angry and think about the situation rationally and only then address it

If possible, try to leave the room in a respectful manner. Don't just storm out without an explanation. Say that you need a timeout, or if that's too much information, say that you need to use the bathroom or take a smoke break or make a brief phonecall. Any pretext that will give you some space but also make it clear that you will be back soon. Or if you need a longer break from the situation, try to volunteer a semi-specific later time to continue the discussion, like this afternoon, tonight or tomorrow.

[Sonrisa]

If possible, try to leave the room in a respectful manner. Don't just storm out without an explanation. Say that you need a timeout, or if that's too much information, say that you need to use the bathroom or take a smoke break or make a brief phonecall. Any pretext that will give you some space but also make it clear that you will be back soon. Or if you need a longer break from the situation, try to volunteer a semi-specific later time to continue the discussion, like this afternoon, tonight or tomorrow.

yeah, it's kind hard to be polite when you are blowing up from anger on the inside. i'd be like yelling out: EXCUSE ME FOR ONE F**KING MINUTE CUZ I NEED TO SHIT AND STAY AWAY FROM BEATING THE CRAP OUT OF YOU!

[VincenzoG91]

It's hard for me, too. In the heat of the moment, I don't want to leave, I want to settle things right then and there, yelling if necessary.

[rodav120]

it used to be my biggest sin, too. Relaxation, deep breathing, meditation did the trick for me.

[mrilover]

I think that the whole concept of anger management is liberal and PC. If anything it should just be about the healthy expression of anger, not the denial of anger. A healthy person doesn't deny his/her emotions.

If a person is angry, simply saying in a firm voice "I did not like xyz action" should suffice.

[VincenzoG91]

I think that the whole concept of anger management is liberal and PC. If anything it should just be about the healthy expression of anger, not the denial of anger. A healthy person doesn't deny his/her emotions.

If a person is angry, simply saying in a firm voice "I did not like xyz action" should suffice.

I had the same ignorant view of anger management before I took the classes. Did you even read this thread? Anger is a perfectly natural reaction to certain negative situations, but people need to manage their anger or else face negative consequences. Display anger in a reckless way and you can get fired, get dumped or divorced, or just alienate friends. There is nothing liberal or conservative about anger management, though your use of the archaic term "PC" certainly marks you as an older conservative.

[mrilover]

I had the same ignorant view of anger management before I took the classes. Did you even read this thread? Anger is a perfectly natural reaction to certain negative situations, but people need to manage their anger or else face negative consequences. Display anger in a reckless way and you can get fired, get dumped or divorced, or just alienate friends. There is nothing liberal or conservative about anger management, though your use of the archaic term "PC" certainly marks you as an older conservative.

I don't like some uses of the term PC, but that's incidental from my point here. I also wasn't referencing politics.

My conception of anger management is that it is about suppressing anger, and presuming that anger is not justified in specific circumstances. If this is misguided, then I guess I have to read up on it lol..