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Thread: Should i give my girlfriend another chance?

  1. #31
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    I'll ask you again:

    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    Do you feel your response was appropriate to the situation?
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    I'll ask you again:


    Umm i got lied to once few days before, then lied to again a few days later this time in my face..

    I honestly feel like i shouldn't have cursed as much nor should i have hit any objects..

    But honestly after finding something out like that, what can you SERIOUSLY do? The girl you've been with 2 years who thought was honest about everything!! Lied to you, and hid things from you..

    I cant just sit there and say its ok babe i forgive or have a peaceful deep conversation

    i mean seriously i was pissed because few days before that i told her to be 100% truthful and she was not!! so thats why i acted how i did! because she didn't come clean days before! and thats all i wanted!

  3. #33
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    You can't imagine someone else responding differently? Really?

    Let's put it this way: would you be proud of your mom watching your response if it was recorded and put on YouTube?

    In not, then you probably should have done something different. You are missing the point here.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Ok i would not want my reaction on youtube what so ever.

    Ok i overreacted for my girlfriend lying to me. thats your point right..


    its hard for me to believe that seeing as how she lied to me, its a BIG DEAL to me

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    I am a jealous person myself, and know where you are coming from. That said, I think you are overreacting big time. From what you've said, she only lied about it because she is scared of your reaction if she tells the truth. And to be honest, I don't blame her for lying to you. I could see if she was lying about kissing someone, or sleeping around, but all she is doing is talking to a friend!

    You can't control someone forever.. you're going to end up pushing her into someone else's arms if you don't let her socialize and have friends. She's only 19 for christ's sake.. You do need help...

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    Ok, lets see if I can put this in perspective.

    Note: What follows is in no way a threat, it's mean to be illustrative.

    Say you and I are walking towards each other on the street. As we pass, you give me a little shove. If I grab your arm, pivot on the balls of my feet, break your arm across my knee, then while you're screaming and falling to your knees and clutching your arm, I start making sure you'll be crapping teeth for a few days...

    Is that your fault? Or is it mine? Was that an appropriate response?

    BTW - Cursing, shouting and hitting objects are all abusive behaviors: They're all intimidation and threats. It's the second step down the road towards physical abuse. Congratulations.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Guillermo View Post
    I don't even know why you responding your not being much help, you refuse to put yours self in my shoes for one second.. just think all that over reacting and cussing and punching the wall started after i found out she lied ok!

    she went on HER OWN WILL to delete her damn facebook ok it was not even my idea, i wasn't even aware she deleted until she told me, same thing for deleting all her male contacts, that was all her choice, i never told her to do that once..

    how would you react if you caught your loved one lying to you again after you begged them for the complete truth.. even if she had no intentions in hurting me.. it still sucks
    1. she probably deleted her facebook so you wouldnt treat her like shit again.
    2. deleted all her friends again because you are acting like a spoiled child and threw a temper tantrum
    3. How would i react? ive been there i walked away, i walk away when im angry and i have a hell of a violent temper.

    as a woman who was in a relationship with a person like you, she will not come away from this relationship unscarred if she doesnt leave now(im talking mentally and emotionally). stop blaming her. every time my 2 abusive exes beat on me guess who they blamed me..you made me hit you, you made me choke you..get the picture?

    TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN ACTIONS STOP BLAMING HER. SHE DIDNT MAKE YOU DO ANYTHING. YOU CONTROL HOW YOU REACT.
    abcdefg gummy bears are chasing me one is red and one is blue the green ones trying to steel my shoe now im runny for my life because the red ones got a knife

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    Quote Originally Posted by jayjay30 View Post
    1. she probably deleted her facebook so you wouldnt treat her like shit again.
    2. deleted all her friends again because you are acting like a spoiled child and threw a temper tantrum
    3. How would i react? ive been there i walked away, i walk away when im angry and i have a hell of a violent temper.

    as a woman who was in a relationship with a person like you, she will not come away from this relationship unscarred if she doesnt leave now(im talking mentally and emotionally). stop blaming her. every time my 2 abusive exes beat on me guess who they blamed me..you made me hit you, you made me choke you..get the picture?

    TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN ACTIONS STOP BLAMING HER. SHE DIDNT MAKE YOU DO ANYTHING. YOU CONTROL HOW YOU REACT.
    so my point of this whole thread is if i should give her another chance for lying? Say i never reacted how i did, but she still lied, then what?

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Guillermo View Post
    so my point of this whole thread is if i should give her another chance for lying? Say i never reacted how i did, but she still lied, then what?
    She wouldn't have lied if you didn't act the way you did.

    Stop justifying your behavior. You have to get help. You're ruining this girl, and every girl that comes after her if you don't.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Guillermo View Post
    so my point of this whole thread is if i should give her another chance for lying? Say i never reacted how i did, but she still lied, then what?
    you just dont get it do you? she was trying to protect herself from your emotional abuse and verbal abuse. if you werent a jealous asshat, then she'd probably been honest with you. she cant be honest with you because of your behaviour stop being hung up on her 'lying' and go get help for yourself. I'm involved in alot of things to do with domestic violence and you my friend are at the beginning stages of it, if YOU DO NOT GET HELP NOW YOU WILL ONLY END UP HURTING HER MORE AND GETTING YOURSELF INTO TROUBLE. listen to the advice you are being given. IF you truly love this young lady you will go get help now. go to anger managment, counseling what ever it takes. this relationship is doomed if you do not.
    abcdefg gummy bears are chasing me one is red and one is blue the green ones trying to steel my shoe now im runny for my life because the red ones got a knife

  11. #41
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    I'm starting to think he's a really good troll.

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    The lies that you are describing are no big deal, and I would be completely amazed if you have never lied in your entire life. In fact, if you claim such a thing, I will automatically assume that you are lying to me. The important part is that your reaction to these lies is extreme and unreasonable, and I think that you should get some counseling. And for all practical purposes, this current relationship is over and you should say goodbye. When the trust is gone, for whatever reason, you are left wandering in a hall of mirrors, never sure of what's a reflection and what's real. Until you get help, nothing that she says or does is ever going to win your trust, because you are lost.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    Oh WOW. Just read this and does this ever sound like my ex!! Word for word. He could have wrote this..!!

    You are an asshole, you have no idea how much you are hurting that girl. Even if she explained to you how much you hurt her.. You wouldnt listen. You only care about yourself and dont give a shitt about her feelings because your a selfish PRICK.

    All you care about is 'waaa she hurts me because guys speak to her.. waaaa and then she covers it up so i dont freak out waaa'.
    You arent going to get help because you think you are COMPLETELY IN THE RIGHT. You are messed up.

    Ugh. I feel for that girl and i hope that she finds it in herself to escape you.
    You have all the weapons you need... Now fight!

  14. #44
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    You are selfish!!
    You basically don't trust her, and You need to learn to trust her.
    Your controlling her way too much!!
    You should feel so lucky and appreciate to have a girl like her because by reading your thread, she sure doesn't deserve to treat like that/you don't deserve to be with her.
    If I was her, I would get fed up and leave you.
    This is all your fault...
    If you actually get to know her friends then maybe you would learn to trust her more. She even gave you chance and ask you to meet her friends, but you didn't.
    Yes it's wrong to lie but her lying is not a really big thing compare to her cheating on you by kissing guys/having sex etc.
    She's listening and doing all the things which makes you happy because she loves you so much.
    Your the one who made her to lie to you because she is scared of what you would say to her.
    She's putting so much effort in to this relationship and seems like your not, only thing your doing is hurting her!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Guillermo View Post
    Ok i would not want my reaction on youtube what so ever.

    Ok i overreacted for my girlfriend lying to me. thats your point right..


    its hard for me to believe that seeing as how she lied to me, its a BIG DEAL to me
    Yes. You got it. As for her, I would dump her for lying. But your reaction is yours to deal with. Just like her lying is hers.

    Better luck next time, hun.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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