I know I should hate him even more now...

[Wakeup]

It's funny on the guys' side you read titles like:
"Would she take me back"
"How can I get her back"
"What can I do to get her back", etc.

On the girls' side: "I know I should hate him even more now" AHAHHAHAH...

I little less vindictive there girls... Remember you used to love(?) that person...lol.

Worse case of reading comprehension I've seen on here. different scenerios can't apply to this particular thread.. Besides, Did you not read that he's a douche and she's having a hard time leaving him behind and grasping at any excuse why she shouldn't just get up and leave?

OP: Get out of there or tell him to STFU. Stop the pity party and start being more assertive.

[toknow]

LOL... Worse case of comprehending reading comprehension.

[HeartIsAching]

"I know you are, but what am I?"

Dude, is that best you can come up with? Pathetic.

[michelle23]

She didnt trest him badly. He has her so low she is blaming herself. He has walked all over her from the start and shes too insecure to see she can do better.

[brokenhearted91]

I was too preoccupied with how I felt about not wanting to be away from home that I took it out on him. He tried to be there for me and I'd take stuff out on him. I focused on my own problems instead of involving myself in his life. I made him unhappy (that's something I wish he'd give me the change to put right). I know I'm not 100% the victim but neither is he. My emotions are so up and down. I feel so desperately sad and upset that he chose to end it with me when I wanted to give more to him and just want to break down. But I also feel angry at how he's behaved since, talking about those things, he didnt need to do that.

I miss him desperately and just want him back but I don't know if that will ever happen. I wish I didn't care and this was easier but I do care, I love him so much. That's why to think he can think about moving on absolutely shatters me, he always said he'd never have a relationship for a long time if we split up, and for it to be just 3 weeks (even though he said she's just a friend don't worry) I can't stop thinking about it.

The only way I would be allowed to get out of that contract is a) find a stranger to move in (which isn't an option, it's more like a bed sit - one room with a kitchen and a double bed and its unlikely that someone would want to move into a place like that with someone they don't know or to be able to find someone who needs a place because as its student accommodation they have to be a student) or b) to pay my half of the rent off which I just cannot afford, literally I do not have that amount of money to pay. So I'm stuck there watching someone I love and just want to hold and for them to hold me and tell me that everything will be okay.

[michelle23]

You had a lot going on in your life-if he really loved you he would understand and try to pull you closer-not push you away. All couples go through this stuff-its normal but it will either make you or break you.

In your case-it broke your relationship. Stop blaming yourself and stop making excuses for him.

Grow a pair OP and accept he is in the wrong here. He rubbed it in your face and anyone who "loves you" would not be so cruel or nasty. He did that to hurt you and you need to realize he will continue to do that if you get back together.

Like I said before-its like your his puppet and he pulls all the strings. Wake up here!

[Wakeup]

She was selfish within the relationship and he took her crap until he couldn't take it anymore. Now they are broken up. It took two people to make this over, not just him, not just her. Now he is being cruel because he want's it completely over and is sick of this half-assed arrangement that is stagnating the both of you ~ Particularily you, "brokenhearted."

Now.. it's not doing you any good to keep repeating details of your failed relationship. What you should be doing is thinking of ways to get yourself out of there and on your way to starting your life without him in it. That is the issue now.. you stagnating yourself where you are (placing blame at this point is non-productive so just learn from it all so you don't repeat)

Blunt advise: Concentrate on all advice on how to get yourself out and do stop making excuses why you can't. Stop talking to him and stop thinking he's your buddy stop letting him think you're his buddy by letting him tell you about his pulls. He's your ex and he's moving on.

So: What will YOU do to make this situation less emotionally harmful TO YOU? What pro-active options can you actually apply here. Time you started to look after yourself a little better.

[smackie9]

I miss him desperately and just want him back.

This is why she won't make any effort to get the f uck out of there.....she keeps hoping that he will change his mind as long as she stays there she thinks she has a chance. She came here wanting to know how to make him stop being a jerk and make him want her back.


Ain't gonna happen. Stop being so pathetic, and have some self worth. It's over, lick your wounds and get on with life.

[brokenhearted91]

I've been to speak with people at the university and the accommodation, they both said the same thing. I can't go unless I find someone else or pay my half off. I can't even find somewhere on top of that because I literally have no money! I'm not making excuses, I wish I could just leave because it would make it easier. The only reason I'm asking if there is a chance we can be friends or more again if be sees the positive changes I'm going to make in my life because I'm living there and this is the situation. Part of me believes he does love me but didn't believe I could change (because I didn't when I said I would) and that's why he's ended it.

Am I making sense? I don't need people to be sharp with me, I know what I've done wrong and stuff.

[michelle23]

If you go back to him-you will be on and off for ages until someone better comes along and he dumps you for good. He sees you as a doormat OP. If you want to show him you have changed-learn how to stand on your own two feet, set your standards higher and don't take any crap off anyone in future. He has all the power in the relationship-I stand by that and I am not going to change my opinion.

I think you are better off without him. Focus on your studies and count the days until you can go home. Even see if you can do your coursework at home for a month or two. The school might allow it if you tell them your going through a tough time and want to be near your family.

[michelle23]

Look up the stages of grief. You are still in the denial stage. The longer you stay there-the more it will hurt long term OP.

[smackie9]

I'm sure someone in that uni can spare their couch a few nights a week. You can offer house cleaning or cooking as a trade for the temporary accommodations.

[brokenhearted91]

I might be in the denial stage yes, but at the same time people do get back together it's not impossible. I'm trying hard to be realistic about this situation and preparing myself for the worst, believe me I am, but I'm also trying to be optimistic in the sense of we don't know what the future holds.

[michelle23]

Its your choice OP. I dont think hes ever going to treat you any better because your a doormat and you cannot see there is life past him. I strongly recommend you go out find yourself somebody else (even temprsrily) just so you realize there are men in the world who would treat you better if you let them.

[brokenhearted91]

That's easier said than done..