How do guys flirt?

**buzz bee** · 29-09-05, 08:35 PM

ok ive left it alone and havent contacted him today - mind you i havent heard from him either... tho he is a little bit notorious for forgetting to call ppl... should i call again tomorrow or just leave things completly alone?

**Ratfish256** · 01-10-05, 09:02 PM

Originally Posted by buzz bee

ok ive left it alone and havent contacted him today - mind you i havent heard from him either... tho he is a little bit notorious for forgetting to call ppl... should i call again tomorrow or just leave things completly alone?

Id call him. If he is anything like me then he would love to see his crush (lack of a better word) call him and ask him out. He probably is really nervous about calling himself because you havent (you think at least) been the warmest around him. The worst that could happen is he says no and you move on. Plus the more you do this the easier it becomes. If he says no this time the next time it will be that much easier.

* I do not think he will say no*

**Airborne** · 02-10-05, 05:37 PM

They will be somewhat clumsy and will try to attract you to their "bigness" or "manliness" but in the process will more than likely make a fool of themselves. that is if they are a reasonably confidant guy.

On the other hand if they tend to be shy then they will avoid you and probably won't have much to say to you, though will constantly look over in your direction.

**buzz bee** · 03-10-05, 08:39 AM

hey well i ended up sending him an sms on friday (two days after i left the voice mail on his mobile) and basically was really casual and just asked if he'd fogotten to call with a

after it... he sms'ed back straight away telling me that he had tried - makes sence my phone has been acting up... and then as i was writing a response he called

we had a little bit of a chat and i appologised for being a little weird - i told him that im a little shy around guys to begin with however i was at work and couldnt speak for long.... so he said he'd call me back later.... thougth that was a good sign - him responding so quickly and then calling rather than messaging...

its now monday and i havent heard from him.. this guy is mega unreliable when it comes to calling!!! but im starting to think he cant be that interested if he forgets to call... but hes also pretty busy, am i looking into things too much?

he seems to be sending some pretty mixed signals too... im just starting to get a little annoyed at all this dancing around each other!!!

**whaywardj** · 03-10-05, 09:22 AM

*sigh*

Look: Just express your interest without over-expressing it. Forget about who's calling who how many times or when. Forget about how something "might look" or what anyone "might think."

If you're about to go do something and think you'd like his company, call him and tell him so: "Hi. Was just going to so-and-so and thought I'd enjoy your company. If you'd like to meet me, I'll be there at such-and-such a time. Bye." Then go on about your business regardless.

If he gets around to syncing up with you on one or more occasion, great. Go from there. If he never does, so be it. You gave him every opportunity to get closer to you. If he'd wants to, he will. If he doesn't want to, he won't ever get his shit together enough to. Isn't that really all you need to know? Whether he does or doesn't make an effort to be with you? Or are you, rather, preoccupied with wondering why he isn't doing as you want? And isn't that his business at this stage?

Just give him opportunities. If he dosen't respond to them to your liking, or his responses confuse you, move on to someone else who does respond as you like and doesn't confuse you.

**buzz bee** · 03-10-05, 11:05 AM

yeh guess i was just afraid of calling him because i didnt want to look desperate or needy which i know is silly but arent these the games we all play when courting?

maybe i will just let it go and see what happens.. after all if hes thinking about me he will just call - guys dont overanalyse they just do things

and for the record im not worried about why he isnt doing what i want... hardly at that point is it..... im just wondering if he actually likes me or not cos now that ive cleared up my feelings a little he seems to be the one handing out the mixed messages... always thought if i guy said he'd call he would and if he didnt then he wasnt that interested

Tone · 03-10-05, 11:13 AM

I hate to be the bearer of bad news... but if you like someone - no matter how busy you are - you find time for them. That's how I see it at least. You go out the way, you do things you normally don't.

For example - normally I don't ever come onto LF in non-working hours, especially weekends, but well, here I am. ;)

I'm really sorry darlin, but I'd say try to move on.

**whaywardj** · 03-10-05, 11:16 AM

"...always thought if i guy said he'd call he would and if he didnt then he wasnt that interested."

Actually, that pretty much IS the case. If I'm interested in a woman, I'm damn well not going to "forget" to call her. If I'm not, I might.

On the other hand, as you said I think, people do get busy and, sometimes, experience mixed feelings about starting up something as consuming as a romance can be. Also: People can get a little off-balance once they realize someone's interested in them.

Don't draw any conclusions about whether he is or isn't interested and don't lose any sleep over it. Just invite him in until you grow tired of it, or until he responds and you don't have to invite him anymore. You're not being "needy." You're just giving him every opportunity you can.

**whaywardj** · 03-10-05, 11:18 AM

Originally Posted by Tone

I hate to be the bearer of bad news... but if you like someone - no matter how busy you are - you find time for them...

Knew there was a reason I liked you, Tone. You think like me!

**buzz bee** · 03-10-05, 11:19 AM

yeh thanks guys... ive made it obvious that im interested and he was too for a while... maybe ive just been too flaky and difficult and hes decided that its not worth all the time and effort - doesnt bother me i understand - he said he would call and hasnt, would say that the ball is in his court and i guess ill just forget about it til he makes a move - if he doesnt then ill have my answer and if he does then yay me

just interesting since he took a litle bit of a risk even coming on to me - we are actually in business together...

**whaywardj** · 03-10-05, 11:22 AM

if it's any consolation, you can always call me.

or Tone.

**buzz bee** · 03-10-05, 11:30 AM

haha thanks but i think the distance would be insurmountable

**whaywardj** · 03-10-05, 12:35 PM

Yes. I suppose I am somewhat elevated above the gibbering masses.

**Only-virgins** · 03-10-05, 12:37 PM

I dont flirt.

Tone · 03-10-05, 09:04 PM

Originally Posted by whaywardj

if it's any consolation, you can always call me.

or Tone.

617-3809

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