Fetish could end relationship

[Illusional]

alright with all the negativity, i guess i'll vote to support this asshole of a bf.

raverboy

[nejie]

can anybody explain this fetish briefly to me??? pls enlighten me...

[Cain]

can anybody explain this fetish briefly to me??? pls enlighten me...

Lay down so I can shit on your chest.

[Grape]

can anybody explain this fetish briefly to me??? pls enlighten me...

You should probably read all the posts before asking for someone to repeat himself.

[Aegis]

Understanding and patience is a fine thing, conceptually. I feel like I exercise it more often than others, and generally end up regretting it, because people don't change as much as one would like to think, or even as much as they would say.

You don't have to be perfect to recognize imperfection. Ridding yourself of him will be something you'll thank yourself for later on. He's just plain creepy. Go on and invest time and money on a personal improvement project for him, or just get rid of him and be done with it.

[lesa]

Sometimes the best therapy for a person is to leave him/her.

If many people have left a person for a behavior then that person may seek to change that behavior.

[Claire84]

Sometimes the best therapy for a person is to leave him/her.

If many people have left a person for a behavior then that person may seek to change that behavior.

That probably is true but I would find that upsetting if he was willing to let me go and change his behaviour if he met someone else but not change for me.

[lesa]

That probably is true but I would find that upsetting if he was willing to let me go and change his behaviour if he met someone else but not change for me.

I don't mean that he is changing for someone else or you. He has to be willing to change for himself....that is the ONLY way to successfully change a behavior. Most people will not change without something drastic happening to them. I speak from many years of experience.

It's up to you on whether you are willing to deal with him...but I always tell myself and friends that you have to be willing to deal with them as they are now and not expect them to change. If I cannot deal with him as he is now then I would leave. You can't 'save' him.

[IndiReloaded]

Okay Claire, is this guy *everything* you've ever wanted in a partner, does he satisfy your other needs, is this the man you want to marry & raise a family with?

In other words, do all his other attributes more than make up for the fact that he has this weird, rare fetish that WILL require counselling?

If so, then stay with him & work through it, like Grape says.

But if there's any doubt, then there is NOTHING wrong with leaving him for this. Its a matter of taste. A perfectly acceptable reason to break off with someone, btw. People break up for much less than this and its okay. You are under NO obligation to work through anything with this fellow, or any other one who happens to have or lack traits you like or dislike.

Think about it & decide what you need for your own reasons. Ignore those who would have you martyr yourself b/c of a principle THEY only might believe in if they were put in the same situation. Its easy for ppl to spew platitudes for other ppl when they don't have to live with the consequences.

Relationships are hard enough work w/o going into them with a serious issue like this. If you think the guy's a freak then you are under absolutely NO obligation to stay with him.

[IndiReloaded]

That probably is true but I would find that upsetting if he was willing to let me go and change his behaviour if he met someone else but not change for me.

Why? B/c that would mean that you somehow weren't GOOD ENOUGH or WORTH changing for?

Pretty screwed up thinking there.

Are you actually saying you would find merit in the fact that someone would stop being interested in shit for you? I would simply expect they do it for their own mental health, not mine. I wouldn't take any personal satisfaction in it. In fact, they'd be damned lucky they did get their issues sorted out b/c if they didn't, I'd be the hell out of there & THEIR loss.

Self-esteem issues here, honey? People who play w/their poop are not normal human beings, baby.

PS - That's a lot coming from me, btw. I'm probably one of the more liberal sexual ppl on this board, so this advice isn't exactly coming from a prude.

[anachronistic]

well at least everyone stopped acting like children in this thread.

[shh!]

I think it is really, really sad that a virgin girl has her first exposure to sexual practices this way. No wonder you won't fcuk him... you are too disgusted. I don't blame you. get rid of this guy.

[anachronistic]

compared to other relationship problems, this is something that is very minor. it's very simple; dump him. get him out of your life, move on.

[IndiReloaded]

Lay down so I can shit on your chest.

This was an OV-worthy post. Nice one.

[Cain]

This was an OV-worthy post. Nice one.

I've started to idolize him.

I've actually started planning a Bachelor party just for the hooker.