very broken hearted and upset from this bad breakup.

[Diamondsnpearls]

I woke up this morning crying and really upset. I thought each day might get a tiny bit better but it's not. I'm just wondering what hes thinking. All I want is for him to have his time and realise that this can work if he just changes a little bit so we can BOTH make it work. but the way it's going at the moment is like he doesn't want to do that anymore. i haven't spoken to him since i last seen you, i do really want to hear from him but i want him to do that when he is ready to. i said i'd give him space so that is what i am doing. it's a one in a million chance this could all end up ok. i'm not getting my hopes up.. it was such a special relationship to both of us. everyone was so shocked when they heard about it, just never saw it coming thats why i still dont understand. i'm going out quite a bit,with friends. but when i get home all the feelings just come back and the hurt just stays with me. i'd love to be able to make it work, take it slow ... still love eachother as much just not be together as much as we were. but it cant just be me whos willing to do that. and as he said himself, he doesn't think we can go on.

[Valixy]

Separations hurt for everyone, especially when one is so young. This is why people should learn from the situations they are facing, be honest with themselves, admit their limits, what they can handle and what they can't and decide for something that really suits their circumstances.

Such an intense relationship at 16 you and 19 him really doesn't suit any of you. Even if you're both trying your best it might simply mess up with your future. You are at such an important age, DP, when you need to focus on taking the best decisions for yourself, like continuing studying and you need most of your energy for achieving that. Our internal resources are limited and we simply can't fully dedicate successfully to too many things in the same time and that's why we need to always choose our priorities wisely.

I have no doubt that he is a wonderful guy and that when you're happy together, you're really happy, but he is a great distraction for you from what you should be doing and that is taking care that you're going in the right direction and setting the basis for a happy life. Unless you try to continue your education, your quality of life and possibilities will always be very limited and most chances are that any relationship you will have, will be destined to face many problems.

If you two are back together one day, you will have to try to make sure that you are capable of making a continuous tiring effort to keep both things balanced, your life/studies and your relationship with him. If you realise that you don't have energy for so much, you should be a smart girl and postpone your romantic interests until your personal situation is stable and successful. If it doesn't work out for you two, you should oblige yourself to do the best you can and invest your energy in building your personal happy future anyway.

[kimmie2300]

I am going through something similar. I am waiting for the pain and feeling of emptiness get better. One minute I feel like Im doing great, like I will be ok. Then all of a sudden I find myself crying in front of the cashier. Ugh. I just want this to pass. I, too, am hoping that this time away will make him think of me and what we had and come back. But I can't help to think that all this time away will only make him grow father away. But I guess we have no choice but to leave them alone. If we go chasing after them, they will only run faster. I am finding a lot of help in different forums; reading about similar situations and what the outcomes are. Some are good and some, not so much. I just have to believe that everything happens for a reason, even if I don't see it or understand it right now. If he is meant for me, he will come back. No matter what. Take care, DP

[michelle23]

You will be okay hun. It just takes time. I remember when my first bf cheated on me. Gawd I was a mess for weeks. I remember crying at work on the cash register lol like a twat and my boss brought me into the office and gave me cakes and coffee and talked to me for like half an hour trying to cheer me up. haha hilarious now looking back. And then I still felt like crap for like 6 months but looking back now I dont even know why I was so upset. I wasnt in love with him, it wasnt a good relationship and he wasnt good enough for me. You are only 16-this probably wont be the last heartbreak but we all heal. You will get through it

[Diamondsnpearls]

Just to say that now, I'm 100% single. I was silly and logged onto his Facebook and saw he was asking a girl out for a drink. I got so angry and texted him saying how I hate him that I've lost feelings for him and that I never wanted to see him again. He said "I miss you and the only way to get over it is to move on with my life" I am so deeply hurt and honestly never thought he was that type. He said I had the wrong end of the stick and it was his friends friend. But that makes no difference to me. I feel weak numb and find myself breaking down all of a sudden. He has broken my heart in the worst way possible. I told him just to not speak to me anymore and he hasn't spoke to me since. He didn't even act like he cared he just said "we were never going to get back together I'm sorry it had to end like this" during the relationship even when it was bad he would always tell me how much he loved me and would be there for me. I knew how strongly he felt towards me. Now I am just so shocked, I honestly cannot believe It. I feel like I never knew him and its all just ended so fast after everything we spoke about, a nice future a happy life. It's all just gone down the drain.

[michelle23]

No a lot of people dont leave a relationship until they have lined up someone else. She is likely the reason he dumped you. You tell him to go f**k himself, tell him he is so full of shit and he could have been honest with you and told you it was over days ago instead of being a f**king coward and stringing you along while he dates others. Tell him he is a pathetic weak little boy who lacked the balls to just be straight with you and now he can go jump off a bridge for all you care coz you know you can do better than his sorry ass!

You are better off without him and it is easier to get over someone this weak and pathetic. Hes not a man love.

[Diamondsnpearls]

It was a girl he's never ever spoken to before, and is his workmates friend and they were all going out together. I don't believe he spoke to anyone else during the time we were together. He was at work 12 til half 8 everyday then came back to me and spent every weekend with me so wouldn't of had a change to see anyone. But apart from that I agree with you! I feel like he's completely let me down in a huge way and hurt me.

[michelle23]

I know I'm not saying he was cheating on you. I'm saying he wanted to break up with you and wants to date/f**k other people but he strung you along as a backup plan encase he doesn't meet anyone better. That is why he kept saying give him time and space to make up his mind.

Learn a lesson from this babe. When a guy asks for a break-you take it as a breakup and say goodbye there and then. Don't allow anyone to string you along while he makes up his mind.

My ex asked for a break too, then changed his mind when I said no were either together or were not. Im not settling for nothing in between. Then I got suspicious of him and found out a month later he cheated. Dont take any shit from any man-you are worth more

There are billions of guys in the world. Find one who treats you like a rare diamond and never takes you for granted. Good luck

[Diamondsnpearls]

I know he didn't cheat and if I ever found out he did I don't know what I'd do. But everyone including friends and family said he would never be like that and they knew him very well. The girl was his workmates girlfriends friend and they were all going to the pub together. His main problem in the last month was he didn't see his friends as much and I know they've always meant alot to him, he always used to say to me "come out with us I want you to come" so it wasn't anything dodgy. I just want to get over this fast! Because I don't deal with these things well.

[michelle23]

If you want to get over it fast. Then stop making excuses for him. Accept that he was a douche in the end and it was cruel how he ended it. Be angry at him. Its easier to get over someone you hate so focus on how he has screwed you around these past few weeks.

[Diamondsnpearls]

I am feeling more angry than upset towards him. Obviously I still feel like how could he do this and I'm shocked as I never thought he was this selfish nasty carless person. Now I'm just thinking will we ever even talk again? I'm really down about it and where it seems he's doing just fine I'm crying every day.

[Diamondsnpearls]

Mostly the fact he blamed it on me and said "you were too attached and treated me like you were my mum" when everyone knew how could I was too him.

[michelle23]

no you wont talk to him again coz you are gonna get over him and move on. Simple. And it doesn't matter what his reasons are for ending it. Its not the point. The point is he knew it was over ages ago and gave you false hope by saying give him a month blah blah blah. He should have manned up and told you the truth weeks ago.

[Diamondsnpearls]

That's what I'm telling myself now. It was just a big shock after everything that happened and what was said.

[michelle23]

2 weeks max hun to feel sorry for yourself and then you have to pick yourself up and get back out there. Go on a date