At uni and pregnant. Decided to keep it but bf has gone distant.

[Superfantastich]

If you are getting rid of this baby for convenience (as in you would rather it in a couple of years and it'll keep the bf happy) and you seriously still see this bloke in your long term future, aborting sounds totally ridiculous. Babies are not disposable, well they shouldnt be..

[hello1]

If you are getting rid of this baby for convenience (as in you would rather it in a couple of years and it'll keep the bf happy) and you seriously still see this bloke in your long term future, aborting sounds totally ridiculous. Babies are not disposable, well they shouldnt be..

She doesn't want to be a single mother! what is wrong with that? why have a child with a man who obviously does not want it? she important too, she has to look after herself first.

[bloodtippedrose]

If you are getting rid of this baby for convenience (as in you would rather it in a couple of years and it'll keep the bf happy) and you seriously still see this bloke in your long term future, aborting sounds totally ridiculous. Babies are not disposable, well they shouldnt be..

Abortion before the trimester is not wrong. It has not developed a brain, or even resemble a small body. It is goo attached to the side of the body. It is just as morally wrong as a guy cumming and 'wasting' babies everywhere.
That kid does not need to be brought into a world where they will constantly be battling themselves of why their parents did not want them, or even worse, brought up in a broken home. Its best for the OP to wait until she is sufficiently funded and emotionally stable enough to have a child.

[qwertz]

If you are getting rid of this baby for convenience (as in you would rather it in a couple of years and it'll keep the bf happy) and you seriously still see this bloke in your long term future, aborting sounds totally ridiculous. Babies are not disposable, well they shouldnt be..

Oh please. Convenience is a major factor in life. Its not ridiculous at all, but what you wrote is.

[MerryH]

he should have a say too, it is his baby.

No.



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[doppelgaenger]

^^ Sexism.

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[qwertz]

^^ Sexism.

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Ha! Hardly! The woman is the one who carries the baby, gives birth to it and is usually the primary carer. Its much easier for a man to walk away from a unborn baby/child than it is for a woman to walk away.
Yes, decisions should be talked through with a partner, but it is the womans choice 100%...thats why the law states the father has no choice in the matter.

[lostnconfused22]

Thank you all very much for your opinions. They are all appreciated and taken into consideration but still is something I have to decide based on my own beliefs and gut feeling really. Last night I was pissed off when he came home and when he tried to apoligised I left as I was too upset. He did come and find me a bring me inside and we just hugged for ages. He apoligised to me for what had happened and didnt mean it to turn out the way it had. It did make me feel a bit better but he still really upset me yesterday. You cant joke about that stuff. His apology did make me feel better though. I dont know maybe Im just soft but he is taking me monday.

[lostnconfused22]

My bf sent me a message late last night saying 'Im not going monday work out a way to tell my mum.' I had threatened to tell his mum the other day when we were arguing about this. All my friends are busy on that day. I dont know what to do =(

[VincenzoG91]

Ask his mum for a ride to the clinic. Kill two birds with one stone, so to speak.

[lostnconfused22]

She is busy with running her own business. I couldnt do it. But thank you anyway.

[bloodtippedrose]

All your friends are busy? This is kind've an important and emotionally traumatizing day! What shitty people you find to call friends.

[lostnconfused22]

Im sorry I should have ebeen a bit more explanatory with what I had said. I have some amazing wonderfull friends which I have known for many years. They are busy as they all have jobs but I have had 2 or 3 friends offer to take time off work to take me. What I was trying to get at even though they offered it shouldnt be there responsibility. He was the one that got me pregnant. He is my boyfriend.

He just rang me the. He said he was only joking last night to see what id say. Im so upset and told him you dont joke about stuff like that. He then told me hes sorry and that hes been emotional too. Im not even sure if i want to have this abortion anymore =(

[2moraNeverKnows]

firstly, at 26 he does seem very immature.. you're absolutely right when you say you don;t joke about these things.
Reading through it sounded as if your guy's a decent chap that was just (understandably) freaked out some. But the more I read the more I thought he was a bit of a dropkick immature deadbeat. Fishing or raising a child with someone you love (if he really does love you..) is not even a decision process that should be encountered. I was a bit staggered by that.

I think you have to decide whether you want to raise a child on your own.. you say you have very supportive parents, so factor this into your decision and if you fella decides to man up & take some responsibility then great, although I doubt this will happen.

Speak with your closest friends & family & take in what they say but trust your instincts. You sound like a good person & I'm sure things will out for you one way or another whichever path you choose.

[lostnconfused22]

He Keeps saying hes sorry though... this morning hes been saying sorry over and over again and that I should come down for tea. Hes a fairly loyal boyfriend but he cant keep blaming this one me. I was certain I wanted to have an abortion but after doing reading on the internet I dont think I want to kill my own child just because its not the right time or situation to have a kid. I dunno... Im not in a good spot. I know my family is against abortion so I cant speak to them about this. His brother is now alot older and has his own kids. His first daughter was born while he was in high school still. She is now older then me and has done modelling and everything. I think If I did decide to keep this child he would not run off and he would stand by me. He has been brought up this way. All my friends keep asking me while Im still with him though... It makes it so hard.