Am I crazy?

[stev123]

As a Father and Husband, I think you need to let go of feeling young and "excited".

If this isn't a troll thread I can provide some honest advice for once.
It doesn't matter if he's a father or a husband...Let him have fun, just don't disrespect someone who has beared your children and looks after them - not to mention someone you have invested a considerable amount of time with.

[michelle23]

can you elaborate on "fun" stev? how is what hes doing right now not disrespecting the mother of his children? what do you suggest he should do? what would you do?

[stev123]

He had a crush on a woman, it's bound to happen to people, and it all depends on how they deal with it. If I was him and I'm sure he probably did, he just thought things through and took a step back, then realized he was making a huge mistake.
Shit happens, but it's pretty much down to how you deal with it. You can be approached by a girl willing to do anything for you, but if you're in a relationship it's still up to you whether you have enough integrity to say no and just come clean etc.

[michelle23]

ya i agree with you but he hasnt stepped back. he still considers her a really close friend even though hes secretly falling for her and his wife thinks everything is normal

[bcgirl]

He probably didn't know how to give his wife good sexual pleasure, she had no interest in having sex with him because it was like a chore instead of fun. Therefore marriage has no passion.

[lalalita]

If this isn't a troll thread I can provide some honest advice for once.
It doesn't matter if he's a father or a husband...Let him have fun, just don't disrespect someone who has beared your children and looks after them - not to mention someone you have invested a considerable amount of time with.

Once you're married and have children, it is no longer a time to be selfish. There is a bigger picture aside from just your own selfish needs.

[IndiReloaded]

its so destructive and can destroy a happy marriage even if no physical cheating ever occurs.
that is why it would be enough for me to leave and never look back

Interesting.

Please indulge me, I am genuinely curious about the decision making process here. At what point in the emotional 'affair' is the tipping point/act that would cause you to leave? What is the EA event/act/whatever on which you would make your decision? What constitutes 'enough'?

[searock]

I agree with michelle in that emotional affairs ARE cheating, to me. I was in an emotional affair and it was totally cheating. Physical cheating can actually be a lot less destructive than emotional cheating.

If I found out my boyfriend was having an emotional affair with another woman (i.e. keeping in contact all the time, discussing intimate matters and feelings with her, smiling/brightening/reddening up when he receives a text from her, etc.), I would be devastated.

[michelle23]

by the time most peple figure out whats goin on its too late. there wouldnt be a breakin point for me. any of what searock said bwould make me walk

[Am I crazy?]

wow, some of you ladies really are going off the deep end. So, now we have a young lady in her early 20's, never married, saying she knows about married men in the 40's in long term relationships? that's funny, and clueless at the same time. Hell, I cant even figure out women my own age let alone try to figure out the opposite sex with a 20 years age difference. You must be really smart (sarcasm) with special feminism powers.

and finally, to the ladies who think that when a man becomes a husband and a father that their fun should end, hahahahaha. WTF? You women really are overly obsessed and wrong in your views of men. You act as if we are all walking around with our cocks hanging out like mindless zombies. I'm married with kids. My wife and I both still have a lot of fun. We don't sleep around and are faithful. In fact, I probably have more fun than half the people here half my age. Its all in what you consider fun.

I will readily admit I have no idea what tomorrow will bring in any part of my life, life is unpredictable. What I do know is the people I have met in life (much like some of the ladies commenting here) who think they have it all figured out are the ones who fall the hardest when one day their partner, boss, or whoever realizes how loony they have become.

[michelle23]

yes keep bashing us if it distracts you from the real problem. all the ladies here have tried to help you and you call us insecure for seeing what you cant. your the only one here who looks loony.

im not sure why my age or experience is soo important to you. ive got my head screwed on mate unlike you and im not the one deluding myself into believing im perfect

[Am I crazy?]

yep, your head is screwed alright, we can agree on that one. lol

[michelle23]

im not gonna keep arguing with you. or trying to help you. waste of time. have a nice day

[Am I crazy?]

haha, yeah right.

[michelle23]

nobody has ever taken such a disliking to me here like you have. i wonder what your problem is. whatever it is, its your roblemnot mine but if i bother you that much-then just put me on ignore. all your flaming and derailing threads just to argue with me is childish and pathetic