When should i get engaged?

[Tone]

I wasn't talkin to you, Junsui about that.

I might have read it wrong but I thought he was using the fact that his parents got married so young as one of his arguments to why it's okay for him to do the same.

thats the least accurate part out of the lot of these, i dont want to stay on here for more than a few weeks (hey im honest).

Hey I'm bein honest too that when she gets up and leaves your ass cause she wants to experience being young and not tied down, you'll come back here cause you have no where else or no one else to turn to. You'll tell us how you feel your world is over, how you can't believe she left you after you treated her like a queen, etc etc.

Believe that.

[Tone]

LISTEN TO EVERYTHING I SAY...DO NOT GET ENGAGED. IT IS A BAD MOVE. YOU ARE TOO YOUNG! YOUR RELATIONSHIP WILL PROBABLY NOT LAST, IF IT DOES, FANTASTIC, YOU CAN DREAM. BUT WHAT THE **** IS THE POINT OF BEING ENGAGED FOR 10 YEARS???????????? And the abortion thing, nice try, but no. Went through, and didn't break up then, just did 3 years later. We're not trying to bust your bubble and be dickheads here man, we're telling you the honest to god truth. All of us have experienced this shit already. And it 3 or 4 years you'll be sitting somewhere one day, and you'll think to yourself, "I was a ****in moron!"

And that's what's up.

We're tryin to help you, fella. Obviously we can't change your mind or force your decisions, but I think you realize that if reassurance is what you came here for looking for, you won't get it. Most the people here are 1. Intelligent (even if we don't all agree all the time) 2. Experienced and 3. Honest.

Take it for what it is.

[dukern]

how much do you want to bet about that?
Seriously i made my account solely to ask this one question, i use several other forums, and have friends to talk to, i'd just rather keep this a secret until the end of the year if i decide to ask her.

[Tone]

LoL whatever man.

Don't say we didn't all warn you.

[gHEXjt]

I wasn't talkin to you, Junsui about that.

I might have read it wrong but I thought he was using the fact that his parents got married so young as one of his arguments to why it's okay for him to do the same.


Hey I'm bein honest too that when she gets up and leaves your ass cause she wants to experience being young and not tied down, you'll come back here cause you have no where else or no one else to turn to. You'll tell us how you feel your world is over, how you can't believe she left you after you treated her like a queen, etc etc.

Believe that.

Believe it man! It's 100% true. The odds of the scenario Tone has brought up not happening, are slim to none. Although, hell in a few years you, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, YOU MAY FIND SOMEONE YOU LIKE MORE THAN HER!!!!!!!

[Junsui]

ok those comparisons have nothing to do with what I was asking, but ok. You said your aunt or someone was engaged for 8 years so far and wasn't even thinking about marriage yet? There is nothing wrong with doing things differently from the norm, I just didn't understand getting engaged so soon.

[dukern]

To be honest im often one for doing the unwise ideas and yet for some reason one way or another they seem to work out for the best,i know it's happy go lucky, but it seems to work.
And yeah sure it might kick me in the nuts, but so to could anything, like i mentioned earlier the abortion, which lead to her mum wanting to hunt me down.

experience is what we all need, good or bad i think we all experience things differently, and maybe we learn more from ****ing ourselves up than from getting told how others screwed up. Sure when i have kids i'll tell them not to have unprotected sex, due to what happened when i did (see said i wasn't one for the smart ideas) but i've learned through that mistake, and if my kids make the same mistake, then so be it.

I've been told not to drink alcohol but i've done it and through my experience i've learned it's not as bad as people say, some people say roller coasters are scary, isn't the only way to know by doing them yourselves? (and by being a bit of an adrenaline junkie they couldn't be more wrong imo).

Some people say school is the best time of your life, i beg to differ, i was beaten and bullied, though if it was someones best days, then sure good for them.

In you miss my point, we all need our own experiences and we learn from them, you would have thought by now, that christians who haven't gone to heaven would have learn't that god isn't here to save us, but we all carry on making the same mistakes every day...

erm that got kinda deep i think...

[Junsui]

You're right, we do learn mainly from our own experiences. People just try to save you the pain of going through a bad one by warning you ahead if they have gone through something similar. Go off and get engaged for 10 years. It really makes no difference to us, it is your life afterall, right? Like Tone said, if you are just coming here for reassurance that it's a good idea, you probably won't find it. I wish you luck for the future.

[bluesummer]

Ok, my friend. But I give your relationship a snowflake's chance in hell if you get married too young. I know you have to experience things on your own, but YOU asked the question and we simply answered.

Good luck.

[gHEXjt]

This thread is hilarious, hell its even becoming confrontational. Okay, okay, new game for us to play. How far can dukern get his head up his ass???? Look dude, why do you come here looking for advice, and then get all defensive and shit cause you aren't hearing what you wanted to hear? If you thought it was really a good move, you wouldn't go looking for approval, bottom line. You are right, we learn from our mistakes, but we also learn from the examples of others, and it will make things a lot easier if you take the free advice you've been offered. What the **** is the difference if you are engaged or not?? So you can go around telling other teenagers that you're engaged. It sounds to me like you're just trying to lock her up and seal the deal. Just be with her man. Whatever happens happens, bottom ****in line!

[Junsui]

Thank you gHEXjt! He wouldn't come here if he felt it was the right/best thing to do right now.

[NeoSeminole]

don't listen to everyone, they're just jealous that you found true love at a younger age. I think you should get married so you can spend more of the rest of your life with the person you love. Then when you both grow up, she can divorce you b/c she realized she made a mistake getting married at 18 and she will turn into a slut to make up for lost time. This will give people like Tone and Lloyd a chance to get laid. Do it!!!

[Vanilla Gilr]

Wow Neo...that is really thoughtful of you! What a guy!

[equivo]

Yet another person who comes on here asking questions and only wanting to listen to people who agree with them.

Seriously dude the people on this board KNOW what they're talking about. Most of them are older, more experienced and wiser than you, me or anyone else of our age. If you get engaged now and it doesn't work out (of which there is about a 95%+ chance), then you'll ****ing wish so hard that you'd listened to the people with EXPERIENCE and more knowledge on the subject than you.

IF however, you get engaged, and are still together in 10 years, and then get married (which is so unlikely I can't believe you're even considering the possibility) then great, you took an absolutely monumental gamble and it paid off (think of this scenario as winning the lottery, but with a much higher ticket price).
I'd love to show you some statistics of how many couples of 16/17/18 etc. who are "deeply in love" make it through to mid or even early twenties. Probably about 1 in 1,000.

I know you won't take any of this on board because you've clearly got your mind made up already. Also I know I've repeated most of what's been said, but that's only because you obviously need telling more than once!

We're just trying to help man. Please think about this very, very carefully.

[Debunkt]

Damn, I'm almost afraid to reply. But I will. I'm also young, and my gf lives a 3 hour PLANE RIDE away from me. But I love her, and I plan on being with her for a long time. My opinion? Don't get engaged, don't get married yet. That shit is way too fast, and things have way too much potential to change. If you love someone, words spoken in a church, a ring on a finger, or something legal written on a piece of paper don't matter. Love is all about knowing when to do things. I mean, if you're committed, you're committed. If you're not, you're not. You don't need someone to tell you those things. I'm a sophomore in college. What are my plans? I'm going to move to where my gf is. From that we'll see how things go. Its best to plan no more than one step ahead in my opinion, because if you get to far ahead of yourself then you can't catch yourself when you fall. I do think people on here are a bit pessimistic, but I also have no doubt they'd like to see more relationships work. Love Forum is obviously used to more horror stories than anything else. Also, the more negative you are towards something, the more likely it is to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Stay positive, stay in your relationship, just hold off on anything you're not ready for. There's plenty of unique situations out there, your's may be one. But I'm just a positive person. *casts protection from fire*