Sick of the whole "numbers game"

[NeoSeminole]

Cyanosphere says:

"That doesn't make any sense; every time I try to talk to a new girl, how could she possibly know about the previous girls I approached?

How could she possibly come to the conclusion that I've been using the shotgun approach?

It's not like I'm going up saying "Hey, you're 4th girl I've come up and talked to all week. I'm Cyanosphere by the way."

I wasn't saying that a woman knows how many times you've been rejected. What I meant is that the common denominator in all those situations is you. So clearly you aren't desirable enough to the type of women you approach.

[carl1222]

Cyanosphere says:

"I tried the whole "doing my own thing, let the girls come to me" thing after my previous ex broke up with me last Christmas. I didn't approach girls or try to talk to chat them up. That didn't work at all. I went without a date for months. No girls were coming to me."

if you had poor success with women before, then sitting back and letting them approach you won't work.

Neo is right. There is a world of difference between not trying so hard and not trying at all. Few can pull off the latter.

Carl.

[Yggdrasil]

Remember this little line: LESS is MORE

[Cyanosphere]

There's a difference between approaching a woman and just talking. Not talking at all won't encourage anyone to want to get to know you... instead they will think you're a loner and would much rather not be bothered. You can be sociable with women without engaging in the numbers game.

Women are people too with interests that may be similar to your own... but how can you ever know that if all you do is beg for their number?

Seriously, ask yourself what are you looking for? Getting laid or someone you might have something in common with?

Well, both to be honest. I don't want to date a prude who's going to make me wait for marriage.

And to be honest, I don't need to be 100% compatible with a girl. As long as a girl is pretty, not a bitch and not a gold-digger, I can, I guess you can say, "learn to love them;" to adapt to their little incompatibilities with me.

I've been in relationships before where me and the girl had nothing or little in common, but those differences between us created friction and passion.

Likewise, I've met girls that I shared so much in common with; that had all the same interests and hobbies as me, yet they didn't want to date me.

If you want to get laid... the numbers game works... just as nature intended.

Not really.

To be honest, I wouldn't mind a fling here or there in the meantime while I'm looking for a gf, but even that's hard to come by.

If you want to find a woman you may have more in common with, then you're going to have to forget the numbers game, just be you, and treat women like decent human beings. Take the time to learn about women and build your confidence up --- talk to them without the idea in the back of you mind that you need to pry a number from them. Desperation will only cloud your judgement and you'll end up with women you don't really care for time and time again.

Well it's not like I'm begging for their number immediately; what do you take me for?