F*cked-up in the head - Hugs needed

**kellie_skye** · 19-05-05, 04:02 PM

When I originally signed up, I was going to ask for some advice on this situation I'm always in, but I thought I might leave it a bit.

I'm 16, almost 17, been dating for about 2 1/2 yrs and I always seem to get myself into relationships and as soon as I'm in them I want out. Out of the 5 boyfriends I've had, one was long-term, the others were less than 3 mths. The long-term relationship wasn't fraught with fights or anything, so I want to know why I seem to have changed since then. Its really frustrating.

I'm also so much more depressed since the first (the long-term guy) I always hurt people, and I'm so afraid of hurting others and myself I think that I wait, thinking it'll hurt less, but it ends up being worse.

The current problem: I'm with a guy, almost 2 mths, and quite frankly, I see him just as a friend, but I can't seem to tell him. He's put me up on a pedastal and I'm his first gf, he always tells me he loves me and I feel so guilty but I can't hurt him, he deserves so much more than that.

To make things worse, I got closer to an old friend recently and ended up getting more involved than I wanted to. Yes I goddamn cheated and it's eating me up inside. I mean I like my old friend more "in that way" and I can see us going out or whatever, but I can't even see my bf as more than a friend. I feel so bad and I don't know what to do. Someone just tell me I'm not a horrid *****? Please?

Anything..

**COAD** · 19-05-05, 05:57 PM

Heres a hug from me, i know how you feel.

I think that you are rushing into "more then friends" relationships.
Just so you dont hurt people, you should be friends with them first, and then anything more serious if you can tell that you "like" the person.

**kellie_skye** · 19-05-05, 06:11 PM

what about the current situation? (btw thanks for the hugs *hugs back*)

**COAD** · 19-05-05, 06:50 PM

Current Situtation:
If you rip it now, his feelings arent too strong yet and he wont get hurt as much.
If you do that later, they are going to get strong and you will break his heart.

ITS WICKED HARD! Ive been through it. I understand where you are right now.

Good Luck!

**COAD** · 19-05-05, 06:53 PM

But whatever you do, dont just start ignoring him.
Explain, he will understand. (If he cares about you)

**ghenzmitz** · 20-05-05, 05:37 PM

your bf right now....seems to have the same situation of mine...i've been dumped a month ago...and i love the girl...but then,,......her love for me fades...and it was ok for me....everything will be settled down...just approach him......and explain....to him.....everything that you only see him as a friend.....so go.......you can do it....we can't avoid that ........someone will get hurt....it's always really like that in this world...and i had accepted that already......just promise to love someone......that you really love and who really loves you so much....

**kellie_skye** · 21-05-05, 07:18 AM

Originally Posted by ghenzmitz

your bf right now....seems to have the same situation of mine...i've been dumped a month ago...and i love the girl...but then,,......her love for me fades...and it was ok for me....everything will be settled down...just approach him......and explain....to him.....everything that you only see him as a friend.....so go.......you can do it....we can't avoid that ........someone will get hurt....it's always really like that in this world...and i had accepted that already......just promise to love someone......that you really love and who really loves you so much....

Sheesh ghenz, make me cry already.

Thanks for writing something guys. *hugs* Hope you're ok ghenz, and it all works out for you.

**LightOn** · 21-05-05, 07:42 AM

Originally Posted by kellie_skye

When I originally signed up, I was going to ask for some advice on this situation I'm always in, but I thought I might leave it a bit.

I'm 16, almost 17, been dating for about 2 1/2 yrs and I always seem to get myself into relationships and as soon as I'm in them I want out. Out of the 5 boyfriends I've had, one was long-term, the others were less than 3 mths. The long-term relationship wasn't fraught with fights or anything, so I want to know why I seem to have changed since then. Its really frustrating.

I'm also so much more depressed since the first (the long-term guy) I always hurt people, and I'm so afraid of hurting others and myself I think that I wait, thinking it'll hurt less, but it ends up being worse.

The current problem: I'm with a guy, almost 2 mths, and quite frankly, I see him just as a friend, but I can't seem to tell him. He's put me up on a pedastal and I'm his first gf, he always tells me he loves me and I feel so guilty but I can't hurt him, he deserves so much more than that.

To make things worse, I got closer to an old friend recently and ended up getting more involved than I wanted to. Yes I goddamn cheated and it's eating me up inside. I mean I like my old friend more "in that way" and I can see us going out or whatever, but I can't even see my bf as more than a friend. I feel so bad and I don't know what to do. Someone just tell me I'm not a horrid *****? Please?

Anything..

You're not a horrid ***** but what ya did is wrong. You're bf is putting you up on a pedastool eh? And you don't feel like you deserve it right? Well now why did you cheat in the first place? Because you only see him as a friend, but what kind of friend are you if you cant even let him know you want to be friends? The thing is, is you can let him know, you can be his friend and you can break the news to him

**Only-virgins** · 21-05-05, 07:44 AM

People who cheat and don't come out and tell people they are dating about it deserve to burn alive. The end.

**Junket** · 21-05-05, 09:55 AM

You're a horrid b-i-t-c-h.

No hugs from me.

**ghenzmitz** · 22-05-05, 12:46 PM

it's not that she's horrid that she cheated her bf in the first place....she's just really afraid to make things wrong...I mean....usually girl's perception is to make the guy happy even if the girl sees only the guy as a friend...i had experienced that.....she is really in the middle of .........hmmm....i think....fright......she's afraid to hurt the guy.....SO GIRL....BETTER END IT UP WHILE THE IRON IS HOT.....OTHERWISE......HE MIGHT RUIN YOUR LIFE...

**kellie_skye** · 22-05-05, 02:35 PM

Virgins, Frasbee.

Thanks for making me feel worse about the whole thing. Yes, I know I did the wrong thing, I'm trying to fix it. You guys seem to frequent here so you would know that human emotions are different for everyone, and also that they're very easily hurt. You two have hurt my feelings, I just asked for some help ok? I'm sure you'd feel the same in my situation. Thanks for you help the rest of you. Hope your own relationships work out, and take care, I'm outta here.

**cheazypeaz** · 23-05-05, 04:45 AM

****ing hell i just read the first post in the thread, and thought hang on this sounds just like my girlfreind... about the relationships she has told me she has had before me ... everything the same, she hurt me and says how shes really so sorry etc... i tell her i love her all the time

... and well i thought she had something to tell me .. PMSL... but then i read ur 16 .. phewww!

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