I Broke Up With My Gf And I Like Someone

[rorschach45]

Sorry for this long post. She is my 1st gf. We have been together for 2 years and 1 month. I broke up with her 3 weeks ago. The reason is I am feeling guilty because since last year I feel that I do not love her anymore. I am not proud of her sometimes i think she is not beatuiful, i courted her because i like her personality. I am not giving effort to her like before. I started feeling this thing after we broke up last year march 2013 0for a month because I caught her flirting with her ex in facebook. We went back together on April. She really felt sorry and I really feel she loves me so much and she cares about me but as time goes by this weird feelings happened. I always has urges to talk to other girls but I just ignore it. Then I always feel guilty because of it, i do not give effort to her like before. I think she deserves somebody better than me. Then I applied for a job last year October. I also ask her to apply in the company seeing my feelings can improve if we are not apart. Then there is one girl my officemate. I had a crush on her it felt like love at first sight, well you know, that feeling when you saw her so beautiful and you cant take her out on your head and i chat her sometimes but she has a boyfriend and she is not responding so I just ignore it. Then in January I have learned that this girl and her boyfriend broke up last December so I am chatting her but it seems she is dating this new guy i saw in facebook i even saw them together, i cant do anything since i have a girlfriend and i am feeling sad everytime i am seeing it so i just ignore it again she also knows i have a girlfriend. but as time goes by i am still feeling guilty not giving back to my girlfriend the love she deserves, this made me depress all day but i am not breaking up with her because i feel that i am her world, she loves me so much i am worried that she will be alone i dont want to hurt her that is why i am not breaking up. I also moved to my gf's apartment this april. then this may or june i think i so my officemate again in our office pantry, that feeling happen again like the one before. like love at first sight i cant explain it really touches my heart. so i began chatting her again and i found out the ones dating her last january is now gone and she is still single so i occasionally chat her. She even asked how are things with my girlfriend, then i told her all that we are not good and i am feeling guilty because i cant return the love she is giving me. So we always chat almost everyday this past months started july i think, and i always feel happy and she makes me smile. Now I am really feeling guilty because i have a gf and she does not make me happy, The girl gave me advice to break up with her because she said my gf will just feel pain if i prolong the relationship. Well I broke up with her because of the guild and also i like this girl. The feelings i have for this new girl manned me up to end everything with my gf. Also this girl posting pictures in facebook someone is courting her and i felt pain, this is also a factor i broke up with her because it makes me sad i cant do anything because i have a gf but it is giving me pain. So i ended it 3 weeks ago then the day after we broke up this girl and i have a dinner and she is asking about me and my gf breaking up. THis girl still uploading in facebook with a guy and it is hurting me so much. It hurts much more than the breaking up with my gf. Btw I am letting her feel that i like her by giving signs saying she is beatuful, complimenting her etc when we are chatting before. But now she know we broke up. i am thinking sometimes that she only see me as her friend. And also that if i court her she might think she is just a rebound and would not let me court her. I am feeling sad this days because of this. Please help. I do not know the right thing to do.

[michelle23]

You don't want to be with your gf so end the relationship but there is no point lining up a new gf first. That is immature, selfish and shows you have a fear of being alone.

Why not just be single for awhile until you meet someone you connect with who reciprocates your feelings?

[dontaskme]

So court the new girl, if she dumps your ass, then move on to someone else. Don't make this more complicated than it is man.

[rorschach45]

Aw, How is that immature and selfish? I am really planning to go single but I really like this girl and someone is already courting her. If I go single now she might got a new bf and my chance will be lost,

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So court the new girl, if she dumps your ass, then move on to someone else. Don't make this more complicated than it is man.

Thanks. This got me motivated. If she dumps me I will be single for a while and no more dating. Is it okay to tell her how I feel or should I just let her feel it by my actions to her? You think shenwill think this as rebound?

[dontaskme]

Tell her how you feel, and yes she will think it's a rebound but it is up to you to explain yourself and make her feel that you've been over your ex for a while now.

[milk&honey]

Give it a try and tell her how you feel. She might like you too.

[Wakeup]

i even saw them together, i cant do anything since i have a girlfriend

Uhm... NO! You can't do anything because the girl who is beautiful that you are crushing over doesn't want a ANYTHING to do with you.

If you are basing your reason for not "liking" your gf anymore on the fact that like a girl that doesn't want anything to do with you then I suggest you stop doing that and quit thinking that the only thing holding you back from being with the co-working is the fact you have a girlfriend.

Anyway, you're not happy and it is very silly of you to stay with someone you're not happy with. Let her go now so she can heal and get to the stage of indifference to you. You're being cruel and disingenuous when you act to codependent with fear of being alone as the only reason you keep yourself in her life.

Don't go back to her yet again when you discover that you're not all that and a bag of chips and you can't pull anyone else either... that would truly be cruel and selfish of you.

[ladyloveslosers]

Yeah definitely go for it and see how your cards turn out.