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Thread: Does giving a Girl "space" ever work?

  1. #1
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    Does giving a Girl "space" ever work?

    Hey, my girlfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. We have been dating for over 6 months now and started in the same city. I took a contract position and almost done with it (about 1 month to go). Well, currently because of a few minor fights I am "giving her space" right now. I just wonder how much time should one give to another person, and does this ever turn out to be a good thing?? To me space means "I'm going to break up with you and I'm just too lame to tell you that right now, so I'll make you suffer for awhile not knowing"! haha, but maybe I am reading it wrong. What do you girls think? How much space should I give until I'm like "this aint working for me!"
    Any help is much appreciated.
    P.S. We used to talk everyday pretty constantly, now it is like every other day, and currently i told her to call me when she feels like it cause i didn't wan t to crowd her.....

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by goldfleece View Post
    Hey, my girlfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. We have been dating for over 6 months now and started in the same city. I took a contract position and almost done with it (about 1 month to go). Well, currently because of a few minor fights I am "giving her space" right now. I just wonder how much time should one give to another person, and does this ever turn out to be a good thing?? To me space means "I'm going to break up with you and I'm just too lame to tell you that right now, so I'll make you suffer for awhile not knowing"! haha, but maybe I am reading it wrong. What do you girls think? How much space should I give until I'm like "this aint working for me!"
    Any help is much appreciated.
    P.S. We used to talk everyday pretty constantly, now it is like every other day, and currently i told her to call me when she feels like it cause i didn't wan t to crowd her.....
    In all truthfulness, I think giving any significant other space can cause emotional deviation in either one of two extremes: Either the space can cause
    either of the parties or both to lose the urge to be with each other, or the opposite.

    By observation of similar situations to yours, you can see that if my deduction is correct, giving a girl space can work. It really depends on the situation and how much each party is willing to keep the relationship going initially before the space is given.

    I hope that helps.
    Last edited by QuanSai; 10-11-09 at 11:57 AM.

  3. #3
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    In my experience giving space leads to breaking up. The space might be misinterpreted as you not being interested in her anymore. Have you talked to her about it? Just make sure it is very very clear that you are not losing interest. Even if you talked about it and she agreed that space would be a good thing she might still be thinking that you are saying that because you are losing interest. I would give her space but still do little things to show you are thinking about her and still love her.

  4. #4
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    I made it very clear that I stilll love her and miss her, but that I was giving it to her because she asked for it. She said we are still together and refers to me to other guys as her boyfriend still as far as I know. I was mostly just giving it cause she said it would be best for her. So I'm trying to do what is best for the relationship even though I really really want to talk to her cause I miss her.

  5. #5
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    I live with my gf and right before she left on a two day trip she had been planning for a long time, we got in a huge fight. She threatened to move out, the whole nine yards. We patched up before her trip but said she really needed some space. So she went on her trip and came back and was as happy as could be with me. She kissed me everytime she saw me, cuddled with me every chance she got, it was amazing. Two days of time apart from each other really put in perspective how much we missed each other, even after a big fight.

  6. #6
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    Yeah, I tried to give her space, and then she texts me that she had food poisoning so i call cause i'm concerned. She seemed happy to hear from me. And then i just figured well i guess we are talking again.....mmmm, not so much, she STILL wants space. And said she wants to see if she misses me and doesn't want someone who "fawns" over her. Ouch, damn, i didn't even think i was doing that. I mean, I love her, but i'm not some sort of super sap. I just like talking to her. I guess I just have to completely ignore her to see what happens? Which sucks cause i miss her, and all it does is build up spite and i just am tempted to go find someone else. Even though I dont really want to do that. It's just making me sad ya know? I guess I just have to continue giving space. What do you all think?

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