What should I do about this...I feel lied to.

[dbzzx]

Ok so we have been together about a year, she lies about stupid things sometimes, I don't fully understand why...Here is an example.

She goes away for three weeks so when she comes back of course I miss her, as I expect to be missed at least a little right, well we make plans for the next day, she calls me and says she doesn't feel good ok, fine. Then she goes to the movies with a friend and call me later and tells me about this, says her friend bugged her and she was feeling a little better and she planned to do this with her one day anyways. I get a bit mad cause I got put second when we had plans, fine, then 4 weeks later she says that she just didnt want to see me and wanted to see her friend, and it was her idea after all.


Why not just say this in the first place, I'm always truthful, I hate lies. This erks me, she sees it as not lying cause she eventually tells me(sometimes months later) But really....How am I suppose to feel about this, I just feel betrayed in a way

[Gigabitch]

She doesn't feel comfortable telling you the truth (which looks to me like you're not the number one priority in her life) and she doesn't have the maturity to realize that she's stringing you along by fibbing about it. I'm sure she's not trying to hurt your feelings, but she probably feels that you're so sensitive she can't do anything but lie.

[Perryville]

If they will lie about a little, they will lie about a lot. She is a deceitful person, run, don't walk, away from her.

[dbzzx]

I will admit I am probably more sensitive then most guys and she is actually less sensitive the most girls, to put it simple, gender roles are switched a bit, she has a more tom boyish side and I have a bit of feminine personality traits, always got along with girls, have a bunch as friends, always did.

This seems to work, we like our differences for the most part, guess its the whole opposites attract thing at work I guess...Thing is it does seem like she cares...When I was gonna leave her once, she ran after me crying...and apologized for acting so uncaring....But she seems to keep on making the same mistakes...its confusing, I do love her more then I thought I could love another person...Just feel like I'm being toyed with a bit or I care to much and she doesn't appreciate me enough.

Feels like my love is going unnoticed sometimes...I don't know what to do, she said this to me last night...

"I don't want to lose you because it might be the biggest mistake I ever make but what if I'm not meant to be with you, what if someone comes along and I fall for them and hurt you even more, thats why I can not leave you, because it might be the biggest mistake of my life and I do love you its just I'm so confused sometimes, I don't know what I want...and it seems like you already have it figured out, you seem sure of me and I cant be sure of you, I feel to young to decide"

I told her to live in the present and make the best of it and if anything happens it happens, and If there was someone else then do what makes you happy even if that means leaving me.

She then went on to say that it feels half and half, one half wants to go and see and the other supposedly bigger half wants to stay cause I make her happy.

[Gigabitch]

Feels like my love is going unnoticed sometimes...I don't know what to do, she said this to me last night...

"I don't want to lose you because it might be the biggest mistake I ever make but what if I'm not meant to be with you, what if someone comes along and I fall for them and hurt you even more, thats why I can not leave you, because it might be the biggest mistake of my life and I do love you its just I'm so confused sometimes, I don't know what I want...and it seems like you already have it figured out, you seem sure of me and I cant be sure of you, I feel to young to decide"

Saying something like that to you is knocking big holes in any trust you might have had. I don't think this is just about gender roles being switched, it's about someone being uncommitted and seriously inconsiderate.

It sounds like she's setting herself up to be blameless even if she does something really horrible, like cheating you and breaking your heart.

[dbzzx]

I should have never been in a relationship, I don't think I will ever again, I can't deal with this, I told myself I would never love somebody, I should have kept it that way. Thanks for the insight, I hope your wrong and everything works out but...yeah...Thanks, I appreciate it.