Can a girl need space and still love you?

[Nikos]

So..I have a very complicated history with this girl...We have been on and off for nearly 3 years now and we had been seeing each other but not saying we were together for the last month or so...sadly...i began to get really attached again...we decided to stop seeing each other so intamantly, and just be friends....

well...a few days later she tells me she likes this other guy she has been hanging out with...I did not expect her to find someone else so quickly and am really hurting...

She says she is just scared and wants to be able to meet other people....she cries and tells me that she knows we will be together someday and that she loves me still...and that she does not know where her new relationship is going...I am trying to not see her but I miss her so much and her company...any advice...and do you think it is possible she still loves me and believes we will be together in the future, even though now she just wants to meet other people (while she is young, she says)...any advice is welcomed...

thanks to all...

and sorry I did not introduce myself at first...

I am nick, 20, and a college student....

[TAVS]

She's messing with your head. The sooner you put her behind you the better you'll be. I'm confident you wont listen to our advice, but you will realize we're right in time. This relationship is only going to bring you pain

[misombra]

yes she can still love you. she's young and wants to do her own thing. as much as you hate it she's going to move on with her life without you. you should let her go. i'm sorry. .

[independent]

I would just be guessing, but I would say one of two things: 1) she is confused and doesnt have a clue what she wants, or 2) she wants to break it off but she doesnt want to hurt your feelings or upset you so she uses this as a major cop-out.

I have a hard time with the break-up thing myself, which is why I suggested that. I would say to her that it's fine (all this she wants to do) and you guys can be friends. No more sex. Just cut her off, and be friendly if you DO happen to run into her. And make other plans for the weekend. Not on Friday - now. Whether it be with the guys, or a date with another girl...

If she is going out with other guys, you need to move on and get out and have a good time. Dont let her think you are going to sit around and wait for her to make her decision. And dont let yourself think that is the right thing to do either. If you dont feel okay dating other people, then just get out with friends.

[gHEXjt]

I can tell you from personal experience that she can still love you now and not be with you, but won't for long. She can say that all she wants, but being with someone else will give her the fuel she needs to fall out of love with you. It does suck, but in my experience, time apart from me allowed her not to be in love anymore. It sucks, but you trying to still spend time with while she's with someone else will continue to make you feel like shit, and will eventually cause your relationship not to work out in the long run, even if she wants it to at some point, because you will always have in your mind that she wanted to screw around before deciding to be with you. It's really as if she is looking for something better, but in case she doesn't find it, you'll be there for her to come back to, which is complete BS.

[pepsi55]

She is just messing with your head she is with the new guy and doesn't want to be with you.

She may love you but she just wants to keep hold of you move on find someone else and i bet she will come running back!

[Rosebud]

I would just be guessing, but I would say one of two things: 1) she is confused and doesnt have a clue what she wants, or 2) she wants to break it off but she doesnt want to hurt your feelings or upset you so she uses this as a major cop-out.
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I would agree with this. A lot of girls when they are confused gradually push the s/o away by saying they are scared and that they don't know what they want. But in actuality they want to move on with their life but don't want to leave the comfort zone they have made with you. Not all, but some! If she is moving on already and dating other people than she is doing just that. She wants you in range so that if things don't work out she has someone to fall back on... you! Knowing this, you should move on as well. Start meeting new people and dating yourself if your ready for that. It won't be easy but you should cut contact on this one and move on.... If it turns out down the road you guys decided to get back together after you got everything out of your system then fine but right now it just sounds like you both should go your seperate ways instead of stringing each other along on something that may or may not happen.

[Junsui]

Well said Rosebud!

[Rosebud]

why thank you Junsui!! I was actually impressed after I read it too....

Why can't I give myself such good advice?????

[Lloyd95]

I would agree with this. A lot of girls when they are confused gradually push the s/o away by saying they are scared and that they don't know what they want. But in actuality they want to move on with their life but don't want to leave the comfort zone they have made with you. Not all, but some! If she is moving on already and dating other people than she is doing just that. She wants you in range so that if things don't work out she has someone to fall back on... you! Knowing this, you should move on as well. Start meeting new people and dating yourself if your ready for that. It won't be easy but you should cut contact on this one and move on.... If it turns out down the road you guys decided to get back together after you got everything out of your system then fine but right now it just sounds like you both should go your seperate ways instead of stringing each other along on something that may or may not happen.

Again, well said. I agree.

[Junsui]

why thank you Junsui!! I was actually impressed after I read it too....

Why can't I give myself such good advice?????

Because you're biased then

[Nikos]

THanks guys...

[Only-virgins]

No.


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[mhussain]

sorry man but no. TAVS is right. you wont listen to advice. no one does in such matters. but still try to listen mate. i am sorry for you

Hussain