Would she lie about being pregnant? (after one night stand)

[Don Cartagena]

I joined an online dating service out of curiosity a month ago. First time ever. Not long after I joined I was contacted by a woman suggesting we get together for a night of casual sex. I was a little apprehensive because she seemed way too comfortable with the idea of meeting a complete stranger for such a night. But I decided to go for it in the end. She came over, we spent the night together, and had sex three times, with a condom every time. After that I felt unhappy with the decision and regretted it. I decided I didn't want to do something like that again because it made me feel cheap and slutty. So when she started to text me asking when we could do it again, I told her I didn't think it was a good idea and that it would be best for us to go our separate ways. I didn't feel that I owed her anything because she contacted me in the first place and I was very clear from the start that I didn't want a relationship of any kind. But she kept texting me like every day, multiple times a day, trying to pressure me into meeting her again. I held my ground and said I didn't want to, and I was very polite about it. The texts just kept coming and eventually I got a little more stern in my response, making it very clear I don't want anything else from her. Period.

Then, no texts for a week. I thought it had all blown over. Then I got a text from her three days ago saying that she missed her period, and asking if I wore a condom. I said yes, I was very careful and that if she's worried to buy a preg test. She allegedly then took two tests and texted to say they were both positive. Ahhh!!! I said it was probably someone else's since I was so careful and I assume she's been with other people since she was so quick to come to my (a stranger's) house for sex. But she says she was not with anyone else in the month--only me. I don't think I believe that. I don't trust her at all.

My mind keeps reeling through possibilities, like maybe she was already pregnant, and looking for someone to put it on. Or maybe she's lying about being pregnant to get back at me for not wanting to continue our discrete relationship. The last thing I want is a kid with this woman because she strikes me as a little crazy and unstable. Do you think she could be lying to me? Messing with my head? Would a woman do that? I guess if she says she's pregnant and it's mine I could ask for a Dr. letter proving it and stating the predicted date of conception. She doesn't want an abortion, so if she carried it though I'd have to wait and get a paternity test.

What do you think? Would a woman be capable of lying about something like this to manipulate or torment me? What would you do if you were in my shoes? Please provide feedback, I'm a little panicked here.

Thanks so much in advance.

[Don Cartagena]

Any thoughts at all? From anyone? I need a woman's perspective!!

[IndiReloaded]

Ignore her. If she comes after you, then tell her clearly you will demand a paternity test to prove the child is yours. Stay distant though. Even if it is yours, you need not engage in a relationship with her. In fact, if she is a mess and you are stable, you might want to consider going after custody of the child if it does turn out to be yours (unlikely if what you say about the condoms is true).

Good luck. Keep us posted.

[Don Cartagena]

Good luck. Keep us posted.

Thanks. Just got a text from her tihs morning saying she's at the Dr. waiting to be seen. If she's putting me on, it's quite an elaborate ruse. I'm wondering if she is in fact pregnant and looking for someone to pin it on. Man, she's really got my head spinning. Perhaps that's her objective. But, ughh! Filling me with anxiety!

[Wakeup]

Well, I find hard to believe your story but if it's real, I have to ask: Why are you even accepting texts from her? Call a lawyer and ask about your rights or what he thinks about doing this: Block and delete her (there's an app for that) after you've told her that you're not interested and no need to keep you updated. Take the attitude that the kid ISN'T yours until it's born and if she's still trying to assert that it is, then get your own paternity test done and don't leave it up to her to fake some document saying it is.

[Don Cartagena]

Well, I find hard to believe your story but if it's real, I have to ask: Why are you even accepting texts from her? Call a lawyer and ask about your rights or what he thinks about doing this: Block and delete her (there's an app for that) after you've told her that you're not interested and no need to keep you updated. Take the attitude that the kid ISN'T yours until it's born and if she's still trying to assert that it is, then get your own paternity test done and don't leave it up to her to fake some document saying it is.

It's hard to believe, right? I feel like I'm in the twilight zone or something. Like a very bad dream I can't wake up from. It just seems so far fetched and unlikely. But it is within the realm of possibility, which is why I'm so anxious/nervous about it. If her goal was to mess with me, she accomplished that with flying colors. But I assure you, every last thing I wrote is true.

[Wakeup]

You didn't comment on the advice part! Whats more important is what are you going to do about the situation? True or not, what actions (besides being worried) are you going to implement to help you to get rid of Miss Fatel Attraction?

[Don Cartagena]

You didn't comment on the advice part! Whats more important is what are you going to do about the situation? True or not, what actions (besides being worried) are you going to implement to help you to get rid of Miss Fatel Attraction?

I'm not entirely sure. I suppose perhaps ask to go with her to a Dr. apt and hear from the Dr. how far along the pregnancy is. How accurately can they estimate the conception date?

I will also definitely ask for a paternity test later on if she is in fact pregnant! But do you have any further advice?

[Wakeup]

I'm not entirely sure. I suppose perhaps ask to go with her to a Dr. apt and hear from the Dr. how far along the pregnancy is. How accurately can they estimate the conception date?

Whats wrong with you? You DO NOT involve yourself in her life in the least. You don't need to even care how far along she is becuase if it's your baby, you'll find out when it's born after you've had a paternity test done. You don't want to establish some sort of obligational attachment to her. She was a one night stand. Make it stay that way.

How old are you two?

[Don Cartagena]

Whats wrong with you? You DO NOT involve yourself in her life in the least. You don't need to even care how far along she is becuase if it's your baby, you'll find out when it's born after you've had a paternity test done. You don't want to establish some sort of obligational attachment to her. She was a one night stand. Make it stay that way.

How old are you two?

I guess my interest in having a Dr. confirm how long she is would give me peace of mind if it was too far along to be mine. But I think you're probably right to suggest zero interaction. She may just fall off the grid.

We're both 30, give or take a year.

[Wakeup]

Zero contact. Does she know where you live? *Key's slashing dagger music if she does* lol

[ashley89]

I decided I didn't want to do something like that again because it made me feel cheap and slutty.

Are you sure you're a guy? hahaha, kidding.

that is very weird though... something that comes off as odd to me is the fact that she realized this so quickly. how much time had passed between the time you had sex and the time she said she was pregnant? women are more likely to get pregnant when they're ovulating, which is about halfway through their cycle. then even if their period is a few days late there could be many reasons why, not necessarily meaning they're pregnant. and you say you used a condom every time... so it just sounds highly unlikely that she really could be pregnant. I mean I have done some really stupid things in the past like having sex without a condom and letting a guy cum in me when I wasn't on birth control, but I was always extra careful and either took plan B or made sure it wasn't when I was ovulating... and I have never gotten pregnant. Not saying these were good choices or that just because that happened to me means she is safe, but just goes to show how much less her chances are of being pregnant. it just seems suspicious that you only had sex these few times and then suddenly she finds out she's pregnant so soon after? and why would she ask if you used a condom... wouldn't she know?

[ashley89]

You didn't comment on the advice part! Whats more important is what are you going to do about the situation? True or not, what actions (besides being worried) are you going to implement to help you to get rid of Miss Fatel Attraction?

isn't this a direct scene from that movie? hahaha is this guy Dan?

[Don Cartagena]

Are you sure you're a guy? hahaha, kidding.

that is very weird though... something that comes off as odd to me is the fact that she realized this so quickly. how much time had passed between the time you had sex and the time she said she was pregnant? women are more likely to get pregnant when they're ovulating, which is about halfway through their cycle. then even if their period is a few days late there could be many reasons why, not necessarily meaning they're pregnant. and you say you used a condom every time... so it just sounds highly unlikely that she really could be pregnant. I mean I have done some really stupid things in the past like having sex without a condom and letting a guy cum in me when I wasn't on birth control, but I was always extra careful and either took plan B or made sure it wasn't when I was ovulating... and I have never gotten pregnant. Not saying these were good choices or that just because that happened to me means she is safe, but just goes to show how much less her chances are of being pregnant. it just seems suspicious that you only had sex these few times and then suddenly she finds out she's pregnant so soon after? and why would she ask if you used a condom... wouldn't she know?

To answer your question, we were together on 1/10, and her alleged period was supposed to happen around 1/22. So when she told me this Tuesday (1/29) it would have been 19 days after we were together, which is enough time for her to get accurate results, correct? Or no.

Also, here's an update:

She allegedly went to the Dr yesterday and had an ultrasound and a blood test which confirmed that she is pregnant. This is fishy to me because it has only been 3 weeks and I'm fairly sure that ultrasounds (even vaginal ultrasounds) will not produce any positive results until like week 4, 5 or 6. Can anyone comment on that?

Also, yesterday I asked her a number of questions, such as which types of tests the Dr performed, which Dr. she sees, etc. She seemed to be getting irritated that I was asking questions, saying "I don't care if you believe me, I know the truth and that's all that matters." Then later she texted me to say that I had insulted her with all my questions...

Then, this afternoon she texted me today to ask if I wanted to get a coffee with her. Quite a quick turn around. What do you think? A devious ploy to get attention? Is she just trying to maintain contact with me in an effort to keep me in her life? It's hard to tell, because if she really is pregnant and it's mine I don't want to be a cold a$$hole, but I just have a very hard time trusting anything she says. Not at all going to meet her for coffee, but just trying to interpret her behavior and communications.

[Wakeup]

WTF are you still talking to her? Her pregnancy is none of your business. If the baby is your's then it becomes your business. (after its born) I'm no medical expert but I don't know of any doctor that would perform an ultrasound at such an early gestation period.

You're a fool the way you're handling this. She's hoovering you in when all she is to you is a one night stand and three orgasms. Coffee... pffft.

You NEED to be a cold asshole in this instance. I'm starting to think you're just a troll looking to get responses to the poor decision your character makes.

Seriously stop all contact.