Need some advice...from everyone...

[Jeblina]

I really do need some advice...from everyone....from all perspectives. I'll try to make this as short as possible.

My boyfriend and I are planning on moving in together...that is for sure now. My dad is looking at investing in real estate (a condo/townhome/small single family residence)....and letting me live there, with a reduced rent, and I would be a co-owner. This means that I wouldn't be throwing my money away month after month if I was renting...and once my dad and I sell the property in the future, after he gets his down payment back, he and I will split the profit from the sale.

My dad hatched this plan about 3 weeks ago, basically a few days AFTER my boyfriend and I started talking about living together. I haven't been dating this guy for very long officially, but I know him very well. My parents also think that I've been dating him longer than I have (that's what I told them in preparation for telling them that he and I will be living together....they'd think I was crazy to want to live with someone after so short a time).

So I guess what I really mostly need advice on is how to tell my dad that I want my boyfriend to move in. My dad is really doing this for me and my daughter...so we can live in a nicer neighborhood for less money. But if my boyfriend lives with me, we could afford more...blah blah blah. I want to tell my dad sooner rather than later, just in case he decides that he doesn't want my boyfriend living with me, so he's not going to do it....I don't want him wasting his time looking for real estate. I've got to find a really nice way of telling him, "Dad....either way, Bobby and I are going to live together....so you can help us or not...." I just don't know the most tactful way to say it....

I DO have another option though....my parents are divorced...I'm living with my mom right now....she was married to my dad for 25 years and knows him very very well. I COULD tell her about my plans and ask her how SHE would deal with it.

I just don't know....I need advice and perspective on this situation....it's stressing me out...

[TAVS]

I wont help you with this.

[Tone]

I haven't been dating this guy for very long officially, but I know him very well.

God I wish we had that 'rolling eyes' smiley right now so bad...

How long have you been dating this guy, Jeblina?

[Lloyd95]

My parents also think that I've been dating him longer than I have (that's what I told them in preparation for telling them that he and I will be living together....they'd think I was crazy to want to live with someone after so short a time).

Well, you've lied to your parents once so far, and from my perspective, all they both have been is supportive and helpful.

Jeblina, this is wrong in so many ways, and I think you know it, otherwise you wouldn't have lied to your parents. As a parent yourself, you should realize the amount of mutual respect and honestly that is important in a parent/child relationship. You should reconsider living with him.

If you decide to go ahead with your idea, I, like TAVS, have no ideas on how to proceed.

[Converse]

God I wish we had that 'rolling eyes' smiley right now so bad...

How long have you been dating this guy, Jeblina?

I agree with this. People are always rushing into moving in together these days, I've also noticed that because of this relasionships don't last much longer after moving in. I would never consider moving in with some one untill at least over a year+ together. Alot of people I know are moving in together after like 3 months or somthing stupid like this, it's mad gaye.

[Tone]

Especially considering his history... he was a complete assh*le to her when they dated the first time around... then he comes back and lays blame to all his issues on the drugs he claims he no longer is associated with... and 1 month later Jeb is ready to move in with him...

For crying out loud....

[Lloyd95]

and 1 month later Jeb is ready to move in with him...

No self esteem.

[Converse]

Especially considering his history... he was a complete assh*le to her when they dated the first time around... then he comes back and lays blame to all his issues on the drugs he claims he no longer is associated with... and 1 month later Jeb is ready to move in with him...

For crying out loud....

Oh Gawd! She really is a glutton for punishment! :[

[carpflounder]

Jeblina,
Why do you want your bf to live with you now?
you can see him everyday, so why is it neccessary to move in together?

btw, I do not think that you know this guy "very well".

[shh!]

Like everyone else, I think this is a terrible idea, and if I were your dad, I would revoke the offer.

[alice]

what's she got to lose? if things don't work out with her boyfriend, he'll just have to move out again – it's her place.
but i really don't see, why you can't tell your dad. he ought to happy, you and your daughter will have a man in the house – unless he's a crack addict or alcoholic or something.

[shh!]

unless he's a crack addict or alcoholic or something.

He is...............

[misombra]

jeblina, you are crazy. that is all.

[clynn]

Talk with your mom about it.

[daisy]

If you are sure that you want to live with this man (after short dating time) I think you are better to talk to your mother first. She knows your father and may give you good advice.