breakup question

[tomtom]

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[DarkDwarf]

Dude, really, BACAMO.

You have to be kidding me. Are you blind... B-L-I-N-D? She is being the biggest bitch in the world to you. She is completely taking advantage of your insecurity. For your own health, please, BACAMO. Just let her be and move on my friend. Perhaps you still love her, but she evidently does not like you.

Sorry dude, somethings have to come to an end. I am not a girl, but she is certainly being a complete bitch. She is using you. You should N-O-T fight or chase her. You should N-O-T let time decide. You should decide for yourself.

Don't worry though, it isn't your fault that you were blind to this. You just need someone else to tell you.

(Look below for BACAMO definition)

[DarkDwarf]

But i know she still has feelings for me!!!!!

Wrong, she doesn't. You just have feelings for her.

[tomtom]

Wrong, she doesn't. You just have feelings for her.

thats cool man but at the same time everyone ive asked has said that she does? everyone i know says that she clearly does. ive asked boys and girls?

[tomtom]

hey man dont worry im not arguing im just trying to make sense of this for myself.
cos she does things like it was my birhtday a few weeks ago and she bought me really expensive concert tickets and a trip away. it must of come to about 300 in total. thats not the actions of someone who isnt into u in some way. she didnt have to doi that? she would constantly go with me to hospital and stuff if i needed to go and would support me.
she begged me when i said i didnt want to talk to her that she could see or talk to me again cos she cared about me.

[DarkDwarf]

Mmm, don't be mad about argueing. Whatever you choose to believe, it's not what I think that matters, but what you think.

Think about this, if she really liked you, why would she go date the other guy? Perhaps she simply doesn't 'love' you anymore, and only likes you as a friend. I would buy my best friend (who is also a guy) expensive concert tickets, but I don't love him other than platonically(though that is probably due to the fact that I don't bend that way)

The logic of it simply doesn't make sense.

[Michael6084]

dude, MOVE ON.

i've personally dealt with your type of situation, as many others, but i've done that whole "fight and chase her" deal, but it's a waste of time to be brutally honest.

i think she's stringing you along. she cheats on you, then "cries her head off for you", then the next minute she says she doesn't want to deal with being in a relationship with you.

1.) you can't make her change her mind. she has to make that decision on her own. don't try to live a "teen romance movie" where somehow the guy manages to show how much he loves her and miraculously they're back together. in real life, if it's done, it's done.

2.) she probably has feelings for you still, but my ex still does for me also. people have feeling for others all the time still, but decide to not be together for many other reasons.

3.) why would you want to be with a girl who's already cheated on you? so you can go through it again? have some self-respect.

so just let it go and find yourself an even better girl instead of hanging onto one who obviously doesn't value you but some other guy she decided to kiss while you two were going out. it sometimes sucks to be single, but it's better being single and looking out for women instead of single and clinging on to a woman who doesn't value you.

[Moonchild]

Sorry, going with the guys on this one. No matter how much she cries, being around her isn't doing you any good for the moment. Back off and figure yourself out. Whether she has interest in you or not (though secondhand information is not the most reliable), she doesn't see a relationship with you going anywhere. Problem being, she's already moved on without you and wants to cling to a friendship she thinks best, but hasn't given you time to move on. So take that time. Tell her not to contact you, that you'll let her know when you've got your head on straight (if you still want to be friends with her).

[Mish]

what should i do? should i fight and chase her? or should i just let time decide? do u girls know how she might be feeling?

I think a better question is, do you really want her back? Do you really look forward to feeling rejected again if you guys are back together? Do you really want to wonder what she might be doing when you are not around? As awesome as you might feel she is right now, do you really want to go through all of that again? Think about what's good for you and whether this realtionship would have any chance to be sustainable. If deep down inside you know that realistically it's not sustainable, isn't it easier to just let it go and look for someone better?

[tomtom]

Hi guys i have edited my original thread just incase she sees it but thanks a million for the advice. much appreciated!!

[Henry123]

I hope you dont have OCD (Obessive Compulsive Disorder) or something related.
Just move on. The ocean is a big place. Think of the opportunity of meeting so many other women out there!