Okay..I have a serious serious problem and everyone keeps telling me the same thing but I have such a problem listening to someone that isn't really involved..so I came to you guys..lol. I've had a girlfriend since I was 17..im now 20 so thats the past 3 years...i love her very very very much...i see myself spending the rest of my life with her...BUT...yes theres always a but......we have a lot of issues and its very hard to continue on when theres so much damage being done...let me explain....this was my bestfriends girlfriend....i know i know already 1 big mistake....but he didnt treat her the way he should have...and she was my very close friend and i couldnt just stand by anymore once i caught feelings for her...we started dating and what do you know? she cheats on me with him....now...this happend a few times and she has also cheated on me with other people...why did i stay with her u might ask? the only logical explantion i can give is that i was very in love with her....but heres the thing...i asked her if she would move out to the next borough over from where she was doing all this and also where i lived...she agreed...we spent the last 2 years living together and for a fact i knew she wasnt cheating cuz we were always together....but i feel like maybe this caused some trust issues in our relationship and im afraid i cant get over them but i dont want to lose her...we recently broke up because i found a number in her phone that shouldnt have been there...now when we break upp..its usually me doing the begging back but this time it was different...and i feel like i shouldnt give in like ive done in the past and let her walk all over me and get back with her again but i really cant see myself without her...i also dont think its fair that i dont trust her and hold the past against her....but i dont know what to do???im scared of putting my all into it and then getting hurt again but i dontknow if the pain would be worse if i lost her?? i really really need someones help cuz im absolutly lost....please respond......
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23-01-10, 08:17 PM #1
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Please help in distress!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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23-01-10, 08:49 PM #2
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You should have dumped her first time she cheated...
Why are you staying with her?....oh wait I know....cos she is a great f...k!
Reality check.
It's you choice. Your self esteem.
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23-01-10, 10:38 PM #3
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have u told her what you just told us? that would be a good place to start.
Here's a heads up for you, ALL women have secrets, they like having secrets, and they dont always have to be huge earth-shattering things either!!
Stop checking her phone unless u want to allow her to check yours.
You have to make a choice, put the past behind you and live each day as if its your last...or keep hold of the hurt and let it destroy any chance you have with this girl.
you decide.
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23-01-10, 10:48 PM #4
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No no no...she's already cheated and more than once...
Now you move on and forget the Disney shit on 'let's get a fresh start learning from our mistakes'...
This is real life and you are wasting your time.
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23-01-10, 10:55 PM #5
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he has been with her 2 yrs since her infidelities and she hasnt strayed as far as he knows. He was 17 when he got with her so i am guessing she was either 17 or younger...give the girl a break she was just out of diapers and needed to share her wares!
and..... he only got with her cos he stole her of his best mate.
They are both as bad as each other imo.
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24-01-10, 01:41 AM #6
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I doubt that she wasn't cheating in these 2 years. If he randomly came across a phone number I'll bet she's randomly but secretly doing all this the whole 2 years.
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24-01-10, 10:32 AM #7
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it's the pre breakup insecurity, you cant picture yourself without him/her but believe me, you CAN live without him/her and it would be more PEACEFUL and you WILL find somebody else who deserver you
keep it simple
Self-esteem isn't bragging about how great you are. It's more like quietly knowing that you're worth a lot (priceless, in fact!). It's not about thinking you're perfect — because nobody is — but knowing that you're worthy of being loved and accepted.
"Me, I try to send this note
float it like a paper boat
But paper sinks
and words are weak
i try, but i cant speak"
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25-01-10, 10:31 PM #8
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Wow. You guys really helped me out. Not like I know what to do all of a sudden but great insight. Yeah, well i guess this is kinda disney land shit. but i dont know...theres just something there that i dont know its worth giving up on..but on the other hand i dont know if i can handle that heart wrenching news again....do i think she'll do it again? no...but thats what i thought the first time...
