Long Distance Love Kick

[soixante]

Hi

I live in the UK my "Gf" lives in the Usa..we have been in a relationship for 2 years..She visited here last year,i spent Xmas and New Year with her and only flew back a couple of days ago..A few days before i was due to fly back we had a chat and she decided she wanted to end our relationship..

The reason is that it has to end because i want to move their with her and get married which she wanted to do..the problem is that i am now out of work and she feels that because of the cost of visas and waiting 6 months for my green card i will not be able to work and she could not be able(and i dont expect her) to support me...I think i did the wrong thing the other day,i said give me a month to find a job,if not then if she wants to go her seperate way maybe that is what should happen..so now ive put more pressure on myself!

Now this is what im absolutetly stumped about..its not that she does not love me..She tells me that every day still on the phone ,we speak for and hour a day or so..we still do the same things,she sends me emails saying "Hi Baby" I Love you etc etc..She just said today that she "Really loves me so much" and its for real you can tell when your with someone so long if they mean it! I said as long as you love me i will never give up..she said i will always love you..Well what does that tell me ?What do i do,i know she doesnt want to give up.i do know that she honestly does love me..its a mind game to me at the monent.I do feel so down,i am devastated that i may lose her!I am a mature guy whos never ever thought suicidal thoughts ever before,but i think about it now..i could not live without this woman in my life..

my first post,hope its in the right place and thanks to any replies

[Lovable]

Maybe she doesn't really want the break up, but she see's no other way??

Talk to her about it, let her know of the confusing things she is saying & how you're not sure what is really in her heart.

[dredgeups]

That's the worst. I put myself in a similar situation once. My advice would be to end the ambiguity. One way or another this gray space of half broken up way worse. You're either together or not. Go into a serious conversation knowing one of those is going to be the outcome. But that does suck.
Good Luck.

[soixante]

Maybe she doesn't really want the break up, but she see's no other way??

Talk to her about it, let her know of the confusing things she is saying & how you're not sure what is really in her heart.

Hmmmm..maybe..but when i had doubts about things early in the relationship,not knowing if long distance could work, she always said to me "never give up" and i didnt,i am so dissapointed that she seems to be giving up..

I have actually wrote in emails about being confused and what she really wants but i have not got a direct answer to my questions..it seems as though shes deliberatly trying to ignore them.and yesteday she actually said to me i need to stop pushing....but then i wonder if im overreacting..maybe she needs some space,but then im worried we may drift apart..

[soixante]

That's the worst. I put myself in a similar situation once. My advice would be to end the ambiguity. One way or another this gray space of half broken up way worse. You're either together or not. Go into a serious conversation knowing one of those is going to be the outcome. But that does suck.
Good Luck.

Sorry i was replying to Lovable when i refreshed and saw your post..yes.thats exactly how i feel..it is way worse..not knowing.Things were great i didnt see it coming..if you could see our mails and have listened to our calls you would not of known there was any problem at all...i have a feeling if i push her though it might be the wrong thing to do....i am actually preparing myself for the worse..maybe i should think positively.Im so at a loss.

Edit..see i just got this mesage from her!!!!

"Awe my poor baby Just wanted to pop in here again and tell you l love you and l will chat later. Kisses. ."

[Primo]

What's the big deal, find a job. Unless you're not willing to do certain things, you will find work. You need to ask yourself what you're willing to do or not do to make it work. True love doesn't end over money.