heartbroken

[nebulachich]

I dated a guy for 10 months. We broke up because I didn't believe he really wanted to be monogamous with me. I called him a few months after the breakup. He said he had been missing me like crazy. I asked to see him. He said he didn't want to unless it was non-exclusively so we didnt' get into the same eomtional roller coaster as when we dated the 1st time. I stupidly agreed thinking maybe he'd come around. We started seeing each other more and more until I found myself getting attached again. He said he was starting to feel vulnerable too and didn't want to.

He went on a trip the following weekend. I didn't think I'd ever hear from him again. As soon as he got back he emailed and called me. I didn't respond. At the end of the week he left a voice mail and told me he was bummed he didn't get to talk to me and was going away for 8 days to a remote wilderness area and wouldn't be able reachable via cell phone and that he would miss me and had been and if I got his message within an hour to call him otherwise he'd talk to me after the trip. I didn't call and I didn't hear from him for over 2 weeks.

I went on a forum he frequents and saw pics of a woman in his jeep. I finally called him. He said he had to get something off his chest.. he's having a hard time seeing me. He thought about just being platonic but it would drive him crazy bcuz he likes having sex with me too much and asked if we could take a break for a few months. I said "if you don't want to see me anymore just say so" "I'm not trying to sugar coat anything" he said. I said no to the break. I He said "well... I hope our paths cross again someday".

I emailed him a few days later and asked if his decision to "take a break" had anything to do with someone else. He said no. I called him a week later. I told him I knew he was seeing someone. "How do you know?" he asked. I said I felt it when he told me he didnt' want to see me anymore but also saw pics on the forum. I asked where/how he met her. He hesitated to tell me anything but after I insisted he said he met her on the trip. I then asked him if he had ever wanted to be exclusive with me to which he sheepishly responded "no". Then I said "So I guess you never meant it when you told me you loved me either". He got angry and said "Everything I said when we were together I meant".

He is moving in with her after 4 months. I am beyond heartbroken. He never meant anything he told me.

[Syd]

well as i see it, he was brave enough to admit to you he never wanted 2b 'exclusive' as u put it, so he may as well have admitted he never loved you there and then and get it over with but he didnt which suggests he really did love you and meant it when he said it...obviously i dont know either of you or the depth of the situation but thats how i reckon men work...once youve got one thing out of them its easy to get the rest out hahaha
As for the moving in with the other girl thing, it'l probably never work out but like i said, i dont know the whole story so i guess thats all i can say...

yay im on a roll today, look at me go! lol

Good luck by the way, dont let him get you down. theyre not worth it!

x Syd x

[LightOn]

I went on a forum he frequents and saw pics of a woman in his jeep.

Had you not done that, You probably wouldn't be here asking questions...Never check up on anybody unless they are your kids.

[cycletease]

I dated a guy for 10 months.

He is moving in with her after 4 months. I am beyond heartbroken. He never meant anything he told me.

You are correct. He didn't love you. You spent 10 months with this guy, many people find this out after years. You are lucky, this guy doesn't deserve you. He was using you and lying to you. You are really better off to know all of this now and be glad things didn't go further.

You are heartbroken now and feel betrayed and I am sorry that you are so hurt. The truth, although it doesn't feel it now, is that you will be over him soon and look back and laugh that you ever wasted your time on such a loser.

He kept you on the hook by lying to you, telling you that he cared...remember that for what it is and don't romanticize your memories of him. Don't call him again. Go out, meet new people and enjoy life without a lying cheater...you escaped mostly unscathed!