So i got this problem. I met this guy online over a year ago now. We live in different parts of the world and it all started out as something innocent, not meant to last.. Now a year later i somehow ended up in his city. We both decided to start from zero kind of. We have met now and i found out that he's the same person i fell for online. In other words he's got me hook line and sinker.
The problem is...
We have been going through some hard times lately and it all ended in me being really insecure with everything. I've been through a lot before (which he knows) and i therefore find it hard to trust people. Lately he has been really really busy, which i know he is at times. However i fresked out because i felt like he just said he was busy to have a reason to not see me. I told him how i felt and he reassured me that he has strong feelings for me too but he's busy and work is important to him right now, which i always know it has been.
One of my problems is just that, i'm going home very soon and our time is running out. I could spend every second with him but since our 'relationship' isn't official yet and since he's so busy he doesn't seem to feel the same.. I kinda want to rush things, i mean while i'm here i want everything i can't have when i leave. I want to be near, i want to hold hands, hug and kiss. While he seems to wanna take it slow or i don't know if he even feels the same.. Even though he always said he does.. Which leads to my other concern.
The second thing is.. I can't seem to shake this feeling i got that i've kinda dissapointed him. He tells me that he has feelings for me but at the same time he's so damn distant. I know he gets like that when he's busy but i can't help to take it personally. I don't wanna bother him with all this since he's really worn out. What should i do?
Sometimes i feel like he's not in a chapter of his life where he has time for a relationship, but on the other hand he's everything i'm looking for and i don't want this to end.