Have you ever loved someone so much, that you didn't even care if you were with them? That you just took comfort in the fact that you loved them unconditionally? That them just knowing how you feel, is enough to get you through your days? Days that seemed lonely before you met this person, but now, just your thoughts of them were enough to keep you company, enough to keep you from being lonely?
Somebody that brings out the best in you, somebody that motivates you to get out of bed and face the day? Somebody who changed your entire attitude about life, in a single, special day? Somebody who just the thought of them, makes you happy every single day? Somebody who you don't talk to on a daily basis, but it feels like they are with you, through every single moment, through every single breath that you take? Someone who has motivated you to find what you love to do, and to do it?
That is who I have met, and I will always cherish these feelings, no matter what may happen, no matter where life may take us. Since we first talked, I have not had a moment of sadness, this entire year, I smile so much when I think of her, that it actually hurts. She is my soul mate, and that's the only thing that I am sure of. All of this writing, its all thanks to her, will she accept that fact? Will she one day realize that we are meant to be together? I pray every single night that she does, I pray that she calls me, I pray for at least a hug right now, to get me through these next few months that ill be away from her. Will she come and see me, or at least call me before I leave? Only God and she knows that, all I can do is hope.
That is the love that I have found, I have not declared my love for her, I just told her how much I care about her. And I told her that us being just friends would be enough to make me happy. She may not know this yet, she is a few years younger, but I'm convinced that she is my soul mate. I know that, deep in my heart, I know it, and nothing will ever change that. Maybe its just not our time yet, maybe she still has lessons to learn on her own. I can't just come out and force her to love me back, I can't force her to leave who she's with and be with me. I can't even force her to be friends, if she doesn't want to be. All I know is that I truly and deeply love her, and I always will.
Is this love? Or is this my imagination? What can I do to win her heart? I am desperate for some answers, and I hope that somebody can help. Because I truly have no idea what to do next. I keep thinking that I'll know when the time comes, but I have been waiting for the answers to come to me, and they have not. Should I pursue her? Tell her how I really feel? Should I just completely leave her alone, and wait for her to make the next move? The problem with that is, I might have to wait forever. But the way that I feel about her, I feel as if I can wait an eternity.