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Thread: advice needed for a sticky situation. new relationship and threesome

  1. #1
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    Oct 2014
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    advice needed for a sticky situation. new relationship and threesome

    I recently started casually dating a guy in my circle of friends last month. We try to arrange a date once a week on a weekend night when we have sitters.. With in this month We did decide to take things slow and take our time We both have been in horrible marriages and ugly divorces. We both are single full time parents of 2. We never had a talk about being exclusive or the status of our relationship. .. The problem i had a threesome in the beginning stages of us dating. One of his good friend was involved with the three. Well last weekend the guy I'm seeing and his friend in the 3some got together and it was out in the open. Of course I got a call from my guy obviously very pissed off. I tried to explain my side of the story and i did get out that it was true but I couldn't get out my whole side of the story. We hung up and I sent him a text later that day to apologize and talk. He didn't respond until wednesday night. He sent a text to say sorry that he was an ass and that he wants to meet and talk on Saturday to clear the air. We had a good phone conversation last night but made it clear that we weren't going to talk about the drama until Saturday which is fine.. I am super freaked out about seeing him. I hate arguments and confrontation.. And coming for a emotional state of being abused in the past. It does bring up flashbacks. He has a right to be upset though. I made sure we would meet in a public place just in case. But I just dont know what more there is to talk about. He heard what happened. I confessed. I just want to get an opinion to see Am I the only one at fault here? And what do you think this meet up is about?

  2. #2
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    He wants to meet up in person to talk to you since that's what adults do.. Chatting over text isn't going to solve any deep problems.
    What's done is done. I wouldnt be with you if I was him but that's just me. I wouldn't want someone engaging in threesomes and slept with my best friend not long ago. Just yucky. I like more private people. But sounds like he's more accepting and that you guys might move forward.. He may not be able to deal with it the more he thinks about it though. Oh well, plenty more in the sea. Goodluck.

  3. #3
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    if he stays in the dating deal with you after learning this he is a better guy than me, i wouldn't like that you hooked up with a friend of mine right before me, small world or small town? i guess he knows all the details off his good friend by now, so might as well be 100% honest when you talk, nothing lose since the full truth is probably in his head. no reason to argue over it, it happened you can't go back and change it. meet up and go on from that point.
    When I tell the truth, it is not for the sake of convincing those who do not know it, but for the sake of defending those that do.
    William Blake

  4. #4
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    Oct 2014
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    It just so many mixed signals. Mind you. I spent the night at his house on Friday. And we both were in a euphoric bliss. And left Saturday Morning BC of family plans. Well by Saturday evening was when the news came out. I thought we were completely done when he hung up.. Wednesday he finally sends me a apologetic text and we made plans for Saturday. Last night we were texting and the he called. We talked for about 4 or 5 hours. Avoiding the subject of the DRAMA purposely that we agreed on not bring it up until we are face to face. We were back to flirting and joking around and we did have some pretty in depth conversation about the studies of religion. But anyways. When all is said and done I just really want to remain friends if not a relationship where it is mutually clear that its not open relationship and just seeing each other.

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