Tips to get win a ex back

[Tkman]

I'm a male 30yo and Feb'11 my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me. I took a few months recently to find myself and focused hard. I found that of all my dating and relationships (even after she broke up with me), she was the only one who touched my heart in a way that makes me melt. Until she left me we were regularly talking about marriage and a family/house. We weren’t going to rush things but were happy that one day we had plan for our futures.

I dealt with breakups before (being dumped or dumping someone else). It took me about 2 months after our breakup in Feb'11 to actually move on and I did. We had no contact until Aug'11 when I unannounced stopped by her job when she got out. We had a very nice conversation for about 15mins (asked how each other’s fam's were doing and stuff). We also apologized the way each of us handled the break up because it was ugly. Before we ended our conversation I mentioned that I was still in love with her and it'll be great if one day you wanted to call and meet up for coffee or something and also maybe talk about "us" again. She just said "ok, sounds good." So from Aug’11 till Oct 9th We still had no contact. So on Oct 9th I called her. It went to V-mail so left a message to call me when she was free. 2 days later I still haven’t heard from her yet.

Since we broke up, she and a ex from years ago started talking again and they have been together since May’11 and also living together. I hear from the grapevine and seen pics on fb of him and her and its like they been together for 100 years and I never existed. Not to toot my own horn, she didn’t trade up. But for her, she knows nothing about what I’m doing nor can’t see anything on my fb page.

Anyway, here is where I’m at. I’m scared; my heart wants me to fight hard to get her back (like guys do in those corny movies). My friends tell me to let it go. Remember, I dealt with a lot of relationships and never had this problem dealing with letting go.

Say this is that Movie; what can I do but also not look desperate and get her mad. I am a optimism and afraid if there might be a chance it might be too late. Can I get her back even though she is in a relationship? I do believe I’m that guy in the move that will do anything to win her back, loL!!

Anyway, thanks for reading

[MerryH]

Those movies are fictional and if the things men do in those movies were to be done by a regular guy in real life, it would be creepy and/or stupid.

You asked her out for coffee, she ignored you. You left her a message, and she ignored you again. She is with someone else and they are living together and seem happy. She has moved on and has shown no indication that she's interested in even a friendship with you. I think you need to move on, too.

[Tkman]

You're right MerryH. All the signs say let it go. It's just so odd that in my whole life that this one has been the hardest to let go. I think its because she has been the first and only one I saw myself spending the rest of my life with. Also her and I getting each others hops up too for a life together. It's just something in me that is holding onto hope that she'll leave that guy and come back.

Anyway, Just because I feel what I do, I don't close my eyes to whats out there. I still continue to date because you don't know whats still out there.