Angel

[Fallen Angel]

Hey i made up this poem i think the begining is weak and i need help to rhyme it please help. thanks.

I asked for a rose, God gave me a bouquet.
I asked for a minute, God gave me a hour.
I asked for love, God gave me that too.
I asked for a angel, and god gave me you.

[Illusional]

umm... only the last phrase rhymes...
how about this one.. off the top of my head.

wait, why are you asking god for all these things?? just go out and get it yourself...

when i looked into your eyes, our future i visualized
i didn't know what to mention, how could i describe this sensation
how i wanted to put it into poetry, yet ultimately
i wanted the perfect poem to be
set into your hands, so my honest feelings you'd understand
at night i imagine what to say when we meet, the perfect words play in my head on constant repeat
yet when i see you, my mind doesn't have a clue
i loose my train concentration, because i desire your affection
so i turned to loveforum.net, because illusional is the best yet...
of course i have to put a twist into your rhyme, because you never ask god for a dime...

enough with all the rhyming...what i'm trying to say is that when you tell this girl something, say how you feel.. sure asking god for all these things in nice and all, but she's not a damn priest. tell her how you feel.. got it?

raverboy

[anachronistic]

You should buy a thesaurus, or a rhyming dictionary. Always comes in handy for poetry and rhyming of course!

By the way, poems don't have to rhyme, and unless you do it right, it doesn't sound quite as good. Keep practicing, keep writing, and don't get stuck on this little poem.

[Illusional]

wing, you're such a sweetheart that it makes me cry.

raverboy

[afterhourz]

yea that was beautiful

[Tedel]

What can I say... it was a little cheesy but nice... awww...

[LewisFisher]

Hey i made up this poem i think the begining is weak and i need help to rhyme it please help. thanks.

I asked for a rose, God gave me a bouquet.
I asked for a minute, God gave me a hour.
I asked for love, God gave me that too.
I asked for a angel, and god gave me you.

This put a smile on my face.. Thanks its perfect.