Is this considered cheating?

[golferdude]

I was with my girlfriend for six months at the time these events happened. The first thing she did was, while i was away at schoolies week with my mates, she had her ex boyfriend (of over 20 months) over at her place, watching a movie alone in her room. She did admit this to me, when i got back and asked her what she did while i was away.

The second thing is, at Christmas, she and her family went for a two week vacation, where i was meeting up with them on the second week. During the first week she met this guy who was staying in the unit next door to her family's, and the two family's spent the first week together. My girlfriend and him got to know each other. When i got there, i noticed straight away that they shared something that first week, and were attracted to each other. I even found a letter in my girlfriends bag from him, stating that he liked her, and he would like to know her better, leaving his personal contact details. This alone caused allot of problems during our vacation together.

When we got home, she said she needed some time to think. Over the next few weeks i spoke to her on the phone a few times and tried to get to the bottom of what was going on. She said she still loved me, but was confused. I soon found out from a friend that she had been in contact with the guy she met on vacation, and had been to the movies with him, and another couple (a double date). She told me nothing of this, and i only found out through the other couples brother, who was home when they were picked up by my girlfriend and the guy from vacation, in his Mercedes.

What is your opinion on these events?

[bulrush]

She wants someone else. But at least you know she is "thinking about things". So yes she might want to see other people.

[smackie9]

Cheating doesn't always mean that sex has to be involved. Dating, like going out, sharing intimate or person conversation, is considered cheating. It would be called an emotional affair.

She's not confused, she's afraid to tell you she isn't into you like she thought. This thing with her ex was the first sign of her realizing this. She tells you she still loves you to distract you from the real truth of the matter. She might have tried to fight off the notion, but reality smacked her hard on vacation....she just couldn't help herself. And like many young ladies, they hate confrontation......she's asked for time to think, to make space between you so she can get the courage to end things. Even tho she hasn't called off the relationship....she has already left it. Time to come face to face with her with what you know and end it amicably.

You want to keep civil about it just in case she decides she wants another chance down the road.....if that is what you wish.

[bcgirl]

Ofcourse she is cheating on you. If you two are exclusive together and she goes on dates with another guy....yes that is cheating.

she had her ex boyfriend (of over 20 months) over at her place, watching a movie alone in her room.

hmm....just watching a movie huh? From all my experience of inviting an ex over to watch a movie...always ends up in sex. I think the majority of the board would agree.

Sorry to break it to ya, but she seems like a girl who gets a lot of attention from guys. She likes the attention and she wants her cake and eat it too. She wants you, her ex and this new vacation guy, she doesn't want to have to pick one. So unfortunately you have to cut the cord on yourself and leave her with 2 (her ex and this vacation guy)