The 'evil' ex

[jaslovesant]

She keeps phoning him late at night, and drunk and pouring out her feelings, asking him to meet up etc. He never phones back, and he never texts back, as far as I know (the last time she phoned I was swearing like mad at the background 'cause I had work in the morning and she was inviting him around her house when she was drunk in the early hours, so he ended up putting the phone down).... and he's deleted her number because he knew I was going off the rail about it, I'm getting annoyed because he has to be secretive about it now because it affects me seeing texts of flirting & asking him to meet up with her when SHE KNOWS FOR A FACT I'M WITH HIM, (1 year, 9 months). She has been chatting to one of our close friends and asking if we've 'split up yet'. I swear shes obsessed. I have swore down to my boyfriend if I see her ever again I'd split her lip because I've just about had enough. I just get worried because say for instance she phoned and asked to meet up when I'm not with him one night, I don't know if I'm getting too paranoid but this cow calls him every name under the sun because he 'won't meet up'...they were together 9 months, and she cheated on him, he gave her another chance and she did it again, then he met me and ended it. I've never been so happy in my life, please help me.

[Ellynn]

Eh, I hate ex's..... They can ruin a perfectly good relationship for some people...

I was dating a guy who's ex came back into the picture....and unfortunately he chose to meet up with her and I found out about it later on..... I didn't understand why....becuz she cheated on him too......and treated him like crap. Well funny thing is eventually I broke up with him and now hes begging for another chance (after being broken up 2 yrs).... But I can't cuz that trust was broken...

Anyways.....if your guy is ignoring her.....thats good! I hope hes smart enough to realize hes got a good thing with you and it would be totally not worth it giving her a chance yet again... All you can really do is trust him.......as hard as it is.

[bluesummer]

This girl needs to get cut out of his life, or it's going to poison your relationship with mistrust. I'm telling you this from experience.

My bf's ex wasn't so psycho and aggressive, but she 'made sure' they maintained a friendship (which for awhile I went along with) so that she could have opportunities to try and 'win him back'. Eventually I had to draw the line, so I told him, it's her or me - you either cut off all contact with her or I'm walking. So he blocked her number from his phone, he blocked her email. She phoned once on a different number, and I just happened to pick up his cell and I basically said "If you want to tell him something, you can tell me and I'll pass it on if I think it's important." She didn't call back.

Just make it clear that her psycho behaviour is making things difficult between you, and he should be making all efforts to get her to back off. He should not be picking up her calls, and if she does call, he should just hang up on her - why would he WANT to carry on a conversation with someone like that, especially when he knows it hurts you?

[jaslovesant]

Thank you ever so much for your replies, in the nicest possible way I like to feel I have'nt been the only one going through 'the evil ex' trauma.

I suppose I'll just deal with it until I hear something else, or he recieves phonecalls or texts - He should hopefully change his phone number in the long-term, but I know somehow she'll interfere, especially now she has her car.

The most agonising thing is she's asking a friend of ours if we're over... which is really a fine cut answer to why she wants to contact him so often, and I'm pretty sure if I ever find out about him meeting her in private or making sweet phonecalls I'll be finishing it because she is getting what she wants and she does not deserve such a wonderful bloke in her life.

Thank you for your time! I needed to let that out of my system!
xx