can't tell what he's really feeling

[pioneerchic]

I've been becoming more and more attracted to this guy who I think likes me a lot but I'm not sure, and for fear of making things awkward I never ask him.

He likes to joke around a lot and play wrestle with me. Also once he told me he loved me and i didn't respond and he quickly added "if i had a younger sister, i'd wish it was you." Also, a really weird thing he said was that i'd be the homecoming queen of my college, i dont know why he said that, it was really weird and awkward.

He works close by to where I live and always asks me to visit, i did once and we talked a lot, he complimented me on what i was wearing and made long eye contact when we would talk.

Recently i ran into him at the mall and he came up to me and put his arm around me and we talked.

My dilemma is what does it seem like he wants? they're is an 8 year age difference which is why i can't tell if he just wants to be friends our more??? any advice

[Lite]

Why not ask him what his intentions are because you feel as if he is giving you mixed signals?

[Gigabitch]

You sound really, really young. If so, that 8-year difference is HUGE.

[carl1222]

You sound really, really young. If so, that 8-year difference is HUGE.

I agree. All we know is that you are in college. If you're 21 or 22 and he's 29 or 30 then the age gap is not such a problem. But if you're 18 or 19 and he's 26 or 27 then the age difference is likely to cause you serious problems because you will change a lot over the next few years.

Carl.

[pioneerchic]

I'm 19. So do you suggest I back away or try to keep the friendship or what?

[carl1222]

I'm 19. So do you suggest I back away or try to keep the friendship or what?

The main problem with trying to remain friends with someone you are getting more romantically attracted to is that you could really get hurt if you become infatuated with him.

If you can back off from all the flirtatious stuff and stop thinking of him as a potential boyfriend then maybe you can keep the friendship. But if you feel yourself becoming more attached to him emotionally, and either/both of you have decided that the relationship is a bad idea right now, then you might have to really cool it for a while.

If you're still in touch in a couple of years (even sooner if you're almost 20), then it might be worth a try.

Carl.

[Aeradalia]

I sense he has romantic feelings for you... though it appears that even he's trying to keep them in check. I agree with Carl and Giga... try to remain friends if you'd like, but dissuade any romantic inclinations... at least for a couple of years, possibly more.

[pioneerchic]

Ultimately I think I'm just going to maintain a simple friendship, which shouldn't be hard (i'm transferring to an out of state university next term). Being around him as little as possible should stunt the growth of my feelings for him.

[Gigabitch]

Good. Older men can be really compelling. Hopefully, he's the sort who is responsible and won't take advantage of this.

[pioneerchic]

Good. Older men can be really compelling. Hopefully, he's the sort who is responsible and won't take advantage of this.

He's always very nice to me...so maybe he is trying to "lure me in" so to say