I have been trying to search answers online to see if anyone is in my position but I honestly didn't know where to begin. Maybe you guys and gals can help me think logically here.
I have been 'seeing' a guy from my company's NY office on and off for 4 months now. Things only get heated up when he is in town but when he is out of town, we hardly speak. He was in town last week and we had a great time when he was here, I spent 2 really good nights with him and thought things were looking up. I though do not plant much hope in him as he is way beyond my league. He is incredible eligible and could get any women he wants.
Anyway, I was on a high after the two nights of course but only to find out from another colleague while on a casual conversation that he thought NY dude was married and had a kid. I know this other colleague used to like me and has told me before that he found me attractive and was keen on dating me but I turned him down 3 years ago as he was a lot younger and I really only think of him as a junior colleague. I did not indicate anything about my relationship with the NY dude and I am pretty sure no one at work is aware so from that point of view, I don't think he said it on purpose or to be malicious. But since the convo with junior colleague, I can't help but wonder if NY dude is married. I don't want to ask around for fear of raising eye brows. He told me he isn't married and is still looking for miss right n thinks he has found her (me?).
Curiosity rose from:
1. Junior colleague thinking he was married with a kid
2. we only communicate properly when he is in town, emails and sms occasionally calls but nothing more than that, only when we both have time to do so and he knows I am in the middle of splitting up with a clingy and vulnerable ex (ex is mentally weak and not acceptable of split n I worry about his wellbeing hence am more hush about my new feelings)
I do really like NY dude but at the same time don't know if he is being truthful. I don't want to be in a relationship or even a possible relationship with a married man.
On communication, I can see it increasing more on his part after the two nights we spent (first time we spent the night together). He calls every other day now when I am at work and I really like how it is progressing but deep down I am not surprised if he is married. How do I really find out? I have asked him and he usually answers, what makes you ask me that? If I am, I won't be here or I think I just only recently found the girl I wanna spent my life with.. along those lines.
Pretty confusing. Any words of wisdom appreciated.