A little confused about what's going on here.. Any help?

[EastS1der]

Know this girl from work, she's cool, and everything was fun when we first met. After a while, she started becomming indifferent. Meanwhile I discuss it with my cuz and he says I probably should have made a move. She said we were just friends, but the way she use to text me, and talk to me didn't make sense.

But lately she has been indifferent, and IDK if it's my fault, if I showed emotion to her that made her see how I feel about her, she got bored of me, or she got tired of waiting for me to make a move. Overall signals were mixed despite the whole "friends" thing.

Overall, fine. Friends, but I can't help but feel like I'm becomming old news. It felt so good to have someone like her to talk to, to check up on me from time to time. Last I saw her, she seemed cool and interested in how I was.

I have not text within a few weeks. Last texts resulted in one word responses.

I'm constantly looking at my phone. Wondering if i should check up on her, and say whats up, or bring up something. Doesn't help that everyone's schedules changed and we dont see each other as much now. It's hard to move on because this is the first time in years I had this close of a friend. I don't think I'll ever tell her how I feel though.

Overall, I know the whole "Don't ** where you eat" deal. And I followed that for a while and was fine, but after getting to know her, my heart kicked my brain and said "F That!". And now I'm stuck.

I don't know if I should ever text her again in fear of not getting a response, or just getting a one word response.

My cousins aren't too much of a help either, Male and female cousins. They say "I'll look weak if I text".

I also been trying to change myself, trying to be more outgoing, more interesting. Overall I think I lost my composure at some point. And I'm trying to get it back, because I think that's who she liked talking to and not this over analyzing person that I become.

I think I did good last time I saw her.

Overall, how do I keep this bridge from burning? Maybe I can't get into a relationship, but she means alot as a friend to me. I even want to tell her that. But it seems there's no way of ever openning up to a girl(as a guy), and not comming off as weird.

That's our curse, we gotta be robotic hard asses, or we become creepy and/or weak. Meanwhile we gotta hold everything in while every opportunity to express ourselves passes to the point of no return. I'm always holding everything in, and I'm tired of it. Especially when it comes to letting a woman slip through your fingers. Regardless of whether or not she feels the same way, you regret never trying.

But one thing to regret is to destroy a friendship. So she's the dealer and I'm putting our trust on the table. If there is one thing worse that rejection, is losing a friend in the process and being tossed out like you never knew each other.

Overall, how should I have read these mixed signals? What does it mean to "make a move"? And have you ever just wanted to be friends but really meant the opposite(that's my cousin's theory about her which doesn't make much sense, but I'll ask)?

[IslandScorp]

First of all, please stop believing that guys have to be "robotic hard asses" and that showing emotion or that you're interested in someone means that you're weak. Where do some guys get this idea from anyway? Personally, I think that people (men and women) who think that they have to be a certain way because that's what they think is expected of them are weak. They have no confidence to be who they really are. When I was growing up, most of my friends were guys and I got along best with the ones who I could talk to openly about anything. They'd tell me about their insecurities, about how they liked a particular girl and how they were afraid of asking her out because she might say no, about not being experienced in the lovemaking department, etc. I never found them to be creepy or thought of them as being weak. I think that you're far too concerned with how you'll be perceived that you might be coming across as insecure or someone who's not interested in a relationship or something along those lines. This girl might have been interested in you but it seems you never responded correctly. I don't know if you can fix it but there's no harm in trying. Only, when you text someone you care about, don't just say things like "Hi. Just saying hello." or something like that. Say "Hi. I've been thinking about you a lot and missing those talks we used to have." or something more along those lines. Someone honest, real, touching. If you've missed the boat with her, then so be it. There'll be another opportunity with someone else. You just need to be willing to put yourself out there. By the way, I hate texts. I know that's how so many people communicate these days but I would much rather be speaking with someone over the phone.

[EastS1der]

First of all, please stop believing that guys have to be "robotic hard asses" and that showing emotion or that you're interested in someone means that you're weak. Where do some guys get this idea from anyway? Personally, I think that people (men and women) who think that they have to be a certain way because that's what they think is expected of them are weak. They have no confidence to be who they really are. When I was growing up, most of my friends were guys and I got along best with the ones who I could talk to openly about anything. They'd tell me about their insecurities, about how they liked a particular girl and how they were afraid of asking her out because she might say no, about not being experienced in the lovemaking department, etc. I never found them to be creepy or thought of them as being weak. I think that you're far too concerned with how you'll be perceived that you might be coming across as insecure or someone who's not interested in a relationship or something along those lines. This girl might have been interested in you but it seems you never responded correctly. I don't know if you can fix it but there's no harm in trying. Only, when you text someone you care about, don't just say things like "Hi. Just saying hello." or something like that. Say "Hi. I've been thinking about you a lot and missing those talks we used to have." or something more along those lines. Someone honest, real, touching. If you've missed the boat with her, then so be it. There'll be another opportunity with someone else. You just need to be willing to put yourself out there. By the way, I hate texts. I know that's how so many people communicate these days but I would much rather be speaking with someone over the phone.

Thanks, how long should I wait to text her again? It's been 2 weeks.

Here's what happened, I text her(after a conversation we had):
Me: Ya, I just gotta stop caring about what people think.

Her: Yup

Me: Is "so and so" working with you tonight?

Her: No

Me: Ok, well goodnight..

No response(she usually responds to that, but combined with the one word responses, it seemed off). She also looked frustrated that day. But because of that, I have not text her in 2 weeks, and I been hoping that she texts me. She seemed cool last time I saw her. More talkative, asking how I was. I think the worst part is finding out I never really meant anything to her and that she just got bored of me like I was just a toy to toss out when I got played out.