there is an absolute refractory period for ALL males, a time when it is impossible for a man to ejaculate after having already having one. The length of time this period lasts depends on the male - some are pretty short, and others are longer. They may not completely lose their erection during this time, but they CANNOT orgasm.
Psyycatdoll - Hi! Long time no see! You can have him masturbate (to orgasm) before you have sex, and listen to all of smackie's advice, only try to use the spermicidal cream AFTER you engage in oral sex (if that is your practice). Try not to expect much the first time. It usually isn't fantastic.
Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?