Girlfriend left me but still loves me

[onalow7]

Hi people,

My Girlfriend of 5 and half years has split up with me 2 weeks ago, I am 26, she is 22, we have had a very good relationship together and been through alot and had some great times. It is out of the blue and everyone is shocked as we make such a good couple. She is saying she still loves me, and has said to my mates girlfriend who she is good friends with that "I adore him, I love him, I can't fault him in any way and I am the man she could imagine marrying". But I don't understand how she can throw something so special away, it is a big risk she is taking. She is saying that she needs to be on her own for a while to find out who she is and what she wants in life, and that she does'nt know if we have a chance, only time will tell. I understand that she needs time on her own, but I have never stopped her doing anything and her me because its not good for a relationship. It has always worried me that we met young and I know that if we met now it would have been a whole lot different the next 5 years, as she would have felt she had'nt missed out on anything, but that can't be helped, and I am glad we met when we did. I know we are great together and I would do anything for her.

She has a good job, good family and had a good relationship, why would she throw that away?, I think she has got scared and feels her life is mapped out, I don't know, all I do know is we had a good thing going and its hard to think that we might not have a chance, and I can't do anything about it. I spoke to her last Monday but she was still the same, I have not hassled her with phone calls etc, I just want to leave her alone to sort her head out and realise what she has lost, hopefully then we would have a chance, but I would need to know for sure that from her heart. It has been hard not contacting her though, I don't want her to just get used things, when thats not neccessarily the right thing, we had a good thing going I can't just let go when I know how much we love each other.

[inkeepingsecret]

what exactly is your question mate? It seems like you have things pretty much figured out. You need to continue on this path, but you def need to leave her alone right now. Once again, the "no contact" rule comes into play. Give her what she want. I know its easier said than done, but try not to think about the reasons why things went wrong, why she is feeling this way, how things were great, how she loves you, how you could change things etc...

The reasons she gave you are somewhat justified, and you are going to have to give her what she wants. Go out with friends, keep yourself occupied, especially your head. I went thru this same kind of thing and the thoughts alone can drive you crazy.

Also, try not to set any expectations. What i mean is, dont say to yourself, "well, if i give her one week of no contact then she want to get back with me" this kind of thinking will only prolong this recovery. Odds are, this may take awile.

[Soulkiss_29]

what exactly is your question mate?

I think that he just needed to rant and get things off his chest. I know when I rant, I feel a whole lot better.