I've had a relationship with my ex for about three years. Last year all of a sudden, out of the blue, he broke up with me. He said he didn't love me in that way anymore, I'd become a friend.
He avoided contact but after a couple of months he started talking to me as if he wanted me back, sending me e-mails while he was drunk, saying how much he missed me. Because he thought I had no feelings for him, he hooked up with the first girl he could get, relationship between them didn't work and soon he searched even more contact with me.
During the summer he started to "chase" me. Wanting me, but at that time, I thought he was up to no good. He wanted to meet me, was fun, but also reached out to kiss me more than once.
At the end of September I started to give in. We kissed and fooled around, even had sex a couple of times. He kept saying it felt scary, that he doesn't know what he's feeling but at other times, when I'm more distant he keeps charming me, calling me sweet names, complimenting.
Last week he said he wanted to try. The first day was bliss, we showered together, he carressed me, cuddled up, sang to me... but the next day he got the feeling again, the one from last year... He said he couldn't, it didn't feel right, couldn't even look me in the eye. As if he's afraid to talk to me, afraid to open up.
He wants to be friends, he says, but every time I even come near him, even after he says so, he's the one bringing his lips closer to mine...
What's up with that and what should I do?