Hi, I'm new to these forums. This post is gonna be long, sorry about that... But I hope someone will read it all, I would very much appreciate it.
I feel like an asshole now, not because of anything I've done, but because of feelings I've got. I'm just wondering if this is normal, and what I should do.
First, let me preface this by saying that I don't fall in love all the time, I'm not that kind of guy who just wants to "get something". I can sometimes stay in love with a girl for over a year, or several years, even though it's not mutual.
So there's a girl I was in love with for over 3 years. To avoid confusion, let's just call her Michelle. That's not her real name, but I'll call her that now. She knew from early on what I felt for her, but it was never mutual, she mostly likes girls, and the very few guys she's liked are not like me at all. But we've always stayed good friends, and that's worked even though I've always had feelings for her.
I thought the feelings for her had gone away after about 3 years, but a mutual friend of ours, who didn't know about those feelings, has said that she thinks it seems like I am in love with her. So that got me thinking, maybe I still am, but I'm just so used to being friends that I "forget" the feelings. I mean, if she wanted to kiss me (or something more), I would probably be in total ecstasy.
But recently, I've met her sister, let's called her Eva. And I've fallen in love with her... I know some other similar cases with my friends, where they've fallen in love with someone, and later with a sibling or cousin of theirs, so I guess it's not very uncommon, but still it feels a little weird, you know? I suppose some people might think "Well, if he couldn't get the girl he wanted, he settled with her sister instead", and I can sort of understand that thought, but it's not that simple, is it? There are so many things you can be attracted to with a person.
But recently, I've -also- developed a little feelings for Michelle's best friend. I know, it's crazy... Let's call her Anna. Again, fictional names I come up with on the spot now. I hope I will lose feelings for her though, and I think I slowly am, because even though she's a great person in many ways, she seems like the kind of girl who likes more to be single in bars and night clubs than have a committed relationship.
To sum some things up...
Michelle: Been in love with her for several years. But it's always been one-sided, and I don't think it will ever be mutual, but of course, anything is possible. But she is also a very independent and individualistic girl, so she might be the girl who could cheat. Although I would probably never hate her if she did it, it would really break me down emotionally...
Eva: Her sister. I actually think I would fit really well with her, we have so much in common, both with interests and viewpoints, and we have good chemistry. The first time we were together, without anyone else, there was no awkward silence, we talked constantly. And she is one of the smartest girl I've met, perhaps the smartest. She's also extraordinarily beautiful. The downside is of course that it feels weird that she's Michelle's sister, and I don't get to be with her very often, because prioritizes her studies and her family a lot. We get to meet each other from time to time, but we mostly just talk online, at the moment...
Anna: Again, a great person, and she's a good friend that I have lots of fun with, but I don't think we would fit in a relationship... See above reasoning.
So, I'm just wondering, is it wrong to go for a relative or good friend of someone you've been in love with previously? How will the previous loved person, and all your friends, react? Any personal experiences? I've never had high hopes with Michelle, but Eva seems so perfect to me...
Should I pursue it, or try to find love somewhere else? There are a couple of other girls that are currently in love with me, but they live far away, and it's not very mutual. And of course that's important, like I said, I don't want to just "get something".