Do women treat dating like a job interview?

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

I have a feeling I'm just one of 3 guys who this girl talking to right now. If it's a contest, I lose in every category. Looks, steady job, financial, & long distant. All I got is my personality.

To me, I think it's pretty sleazy. She gave me all in attention, only to find out she has other guys in mind. I think if you're interested in one guy, you should just focus on him. Having 3 guys to juggle around can give a girl mix feelings. I think it's also unfair to the guys.

What do you ladies think of this?

[carl1222]

Never, ever ever date a girl who is playing the field. If you aren't important enough for her to give you her full attention, then she's not important enough to invest your time and effort.

Carl.

[Junket]

I have a feeling I'm just one of 3 guys who this girl talking to right now. If it's a contest, I lose in every category. Looks, steady job, financial, & long distant. All I got is my personality.

To me, I think it's pretty sleazy. She gave me all in attention, only to find out she has other guys in mind. I think if you're interested in one guy, you should just focus on him. Having 3 guys to juggle around can give a girl mix feelings. I think it's also unfair to the guys.

What do you ladies think of this?

Since when was dating about being fair?

An established, mutually committed relationship is one thing, but she can date whoever she wants to. And if you don't like her, then f*ck her. (Literally if you can).

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

Never, ever ever date a girl who is playing the field. If you aren't important enough for her to give you her full attention, then she's not important enough to invest your time and effort.

Carl.

That's what I'm afraid to hear. You're probably right about it too. To me it sucks. I feel like I've been cheated this whole time. I've invested a lot of time & energy for a contest I'll probably never win.

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

Since when was dating about being fair?

An established, mutually committed relationship is one thing, but she can date whoever she wants to. And if you don't like her, then f*ck her. (Literally if you can).

We've just started talking for over a week. There is no commitment yet. I know this will sound funny, but neither of us mentioned anything about liking eachother. We're just taking it slowly as "friends" first. Like getting to know eachother. Here's my entire story if you want to know the background a bit.

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/28400-she-into-me-should-i-go.html[/url]

[somethingelse]

Never, ever ever date a girl who is playing the field. If you aren't important enough for her to give you her full attention, then she's not important enough to invest your time and effort.

Carl.

I'm with Carl it's not right. If a guy every did that to me i'd be out the door before the hi. I dont see why it should be any different. If she doesnt care enough to just pick one guy, then walk. the thing about playing the field, at the end of the game someone always goes home broken hearted.

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

I'm with Carl it's not right. If a guy every did that to me i'd be out the door before the hi. I dont see why it should be any different. If she doesnt care enough to just pick one guy, then walk. the thing about playing the field, at the end of the game someone always goes home broken hearted.

Exactly. And I'm not going to be on the short end of the straw. I'm not going to invest my time in something that might not work out in the end. It's just not worth it emotionally.

I'm going to ask her straight up tomorrow if she sees me as a friend or something more. If it's just friend, my stomach can digest correctly again. Haha.

[oh.wow]

at one point in time, i was going on dates with different guys at the same time. nothing was ever official with anyone during that time. no sex, just casual dates.

it's kinda interesting and gives you a great perspective of what different people have to offer and it's easier to figure out who you prefer.

how many times have you dated 1 person and put them up on that pedestal.. only to realize that (s)he's not the best for you and if you had figured this out long before.. you may not have wasted so much time!!

well this may help eliminate that kinda situation. i was honest about seeing other people. for some it made them up their game, for others they kinda trailed off..

it's not a bad thing.. unless she's sleeping with everyone, then i'd start to worry.

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

at one point in time, i was going on dates with different guys at the same time. nothing was ever official with anyone during that time. no sex, just casual dates.

it's kinda interesting and gives you a great perspective of what different people have to offer and it's easier to figure out who you prefer.

how many times have you dated 1 person and put them up on that pedestal.. only to realize that (s)he's not the best for you and if you had figured this out long before.. you may not have wasted so much time!!

well this may help eliminate that kinda situation. i was honest about seeing other people. for some it made them up their game, for others they kinda trailed off..

it's not a bad thing.. unless she's sleeping with everyone, then i'd start to worry.

I can't go on a date with her at the moment. That's one of my biggest problem right now. The long distant. If I know she's just interested in me, I'd fly out to see her this weekend. But if there are other guys on her mind, I feel that I'll just be wasting my time & money for a date. Since I can't offer her much right now.

I understand the part about not wasting your time with one person before you found out he is not for you, but you'll also be wasting his time if he is not fit for you.

[Lite]

I'm with Carl it's not right. If a guy every did that to me i'd be out the door before the hi.

Some people date multiple people at once, some don't. Some people see someone and know they're going to marry them. It takes all types, and if they measure you in a way you don't like, then that's a pretty clear sign that you two aren't a good match.

[vashti]

You must be kidding. You expect her to forego casual dating for some long-distance guy she's only been talking to for a week, despite there being no formal commitment? You are dreaming. She'd be an idiot to agree to this. No one should give up casual dating when they don't know you well enough to know if they even like you.

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

You must be kidding. You expect her to forego casual dating for some long-distance guy she's only been talking to for a week, despite there being no formal commitment? You are dreaming. She'd be an idiot to agree to this. No one should give up casual dating when they don't know you well enough to know if they even like you.

Sounds like I am on the short end of the straw. Time to give up I guess.

Just to let you know I will be done with school in 7 months & might be moving out to where she is if I find a job there. I have many families there so it's a possibility. She knows this.

[Lite]

She knows this.

So, you're saying she should forego the cock in the ass for the one in that she might get in 7 months, if you move out there, sort of, maybe?

What a ****ing joke.

[NeverBeenNLuvB4]

So, you're saying she should forego the cock in the ass for the one in that she might get in 7 months, if you move out there, sort of, maybe?

What a ****ing joke.

Thanks for putting that as nicely as possible.

I'm not saying she has to wait for me for any reason. That's pretty selfish on my part. If she wants to see other men, go right ahead. I have no problem with that. Just let me know I'm just another friend. Perfectly fine with me. Don't make me play her game if I'm not the right guy in the end.

[lahnnabell]

Given the circumstances 1. long distance 2. you've been talking for ONLY about a week, this girl has probably assumed that telling you she was dating casually wasn't the top priority. Would you have preferred that she told you during your first conversation that she was casually dating?

Another note, casual dating doesn't mean she's not interested in a committed relationship, but instead she's looking for someone she's truly compatible with. What better way to do that than go on dates with more than one person?

However, as someone else said, if she's sleeping with all of these men, then that's more risky. I wouldn't want to be seeing some guy who was giving it to a bunch of different women.

You hardly know this girl, so my guess is that she didn't feel she owed you any allegiance.