Ugh

[Lenny]

I m a 40 year-old man who is currently in a divorce. I'm a professional. I am attracted to a 22-year-old coworker I needed some advice on whether or not I'm out of my mind think she might give me the time of day. She is extremely sweet and I feel we already have some kind of chemistry and appreciate each others company. She has invited me to the gym a couple of times but I'm unsure whether I should make a move. We have become good friends and I'm not sure if I might destroy our friendship by being honest with her by telling her that I am physically attracted her.

[Harley]

You'd be surprised how many young women actually PREFER older men to men that are around their own age group. I can only imagine this is because older men are a lot more mature, more stable, they've done all their crazy stuff while they were young and may be more trust worthy and more willing to settle down. I'm not trying to say that she is DEFINITELY into you but there may be a chance if you think there already is chemistry there. Unfortunately all I can really say to you is that until you take the risk and tell her how you feel about her you won't know. And to be honest if you like her THAT much and don't take your opportunity to tell her while you still have it and some other bloke steals her away you may end up kicking yourself for a long time. Tell her and see what she says. Explain that if she doesn't feel the same way it's fine and you don't want it to ruin your friendship in any way. Maybe invite her out somewhere nice when you tell her? I'm not sure if either of you meet outside of work but maybe you could go out for some lunch or dinner? Or maybe even go for a nice walk outside somewhere? You'll only know unless you try so be brave and don't be afraid to express how you feel.

[haxan]

Well Lenny, I'd say if by chance she was interested in you, it would be for just a fling. Something new for her to experience that perhaps she hasn't yet (an affair with an older, established man). Just keep in mind you're still going through a divorce and are probably a little bit vulnerable. You run the risk of developing strong feelings for her from a rebound, and the deep affection not being returned on her part, as she may just want a fun, carefree thing.

Just a possible take on it, who knows for sure. I'd say to pursue the possibility, but proceed slowly and with caution.

[dem862]

I think it could ruin your friendship. If she is not interested in you that way, or if a relationship ensues and ends, it could become very awkward indeed. Workplace romances are never a good idea because you can't avoid the person when you need to. Divorces can be nasty and you probably think this girl is just what you need to take your mind off it. That would not be fair to her. Get through your divorce and then spend some time afterwards healing. You probably need a friend now more than you need a lover.

[Wakeup]

Why don't you join an online dating site and stay away from girls at work where if things go south you'll both suffer everyday from it and even loose your jobs if it's actually against company policy. Stop hanging out with her before you're accused of being a lecherous scoundrel by your co-workers. There are hundereds of thousands of lonely women who are in the same boat as you (not quite finished one relationship but still wanting another) that you can date and you can choose an age range that suits you. Don't just pursue this because she's the first "girl" that has been nice to you since the desolution of your marriage.

You are living separately from your wife, right?

[Lenny]

Yes I have been separated for a while now. Thanks for the post. I liked your advice

[Wakeup]

You're welcome, Lenny.
Good luck in your next adventures in dating.