I dont think I can love again..

[ochriso]

I have had many girlfriends since i was about 15 but my last one was amazing.

I got with this girl in August 2010 and I don't want to give you my life story but basically she was deeply in love with me.. and I fell deeply in love with her too. The relationship became long distance and being an idiot I didn't show her enough attention that she craved (I was kind of taking her for granted she thought). But this girl meant everything to me.

She did things that no other girl would do like turn up outside my work after I had a night shift at 7am with breakfast she made for me, she wrote me love letters, she never swore, she always treated everyone with respect, she's really intelligent and very pretty.

So after a year and 2 months she ended it. I quit my job and went straight to her City to try and resolve things, I stayed there for 3 weeks but to no avail.. her love was gone. Since then (october) I have been depressed. I think of her everyday. I don't know if you are aware what a depressed person goes through but im going through all of it.

I tried to meet new people to forget about her and even pretty girls that like me they don't compare to her, I don't find them attractive even if they are beautiful I just think about her and im not interested.

I feel exactly the same now as I did the day i left her.. my love for her has not faded one bit. I miss her so much and dont want anyone else..

I wish I could just disappear.

[surfhb]

Well....i take it you wont be doing something that stupid again for a girl huh?

[Red Apollo]

Your love may not have faded, but hers has. She doesn't love you anymore, and more likely than not, never will. Quit feeling sorry for yourself and move on. You aren't doing yourself, her, or anyone who has to put up with you any favors by hanging on the past. Go out, meet some girls, and quit using her as a benchmark to judge them. If she was such a perfect match for you, she wouldn't have left in the first place.

I felt this way about a girl once after she broke up with me. I can't even remember her last name anymore. Life goes on. I just wish I would have had a friend who just told me the truth and slapped me in the face back then.

[ochriso]

Well....i take it you wont be doing something that stupid again for a girl huh?

What do you mean?

Your love may not have faded, but hers has. She doesn't love you anymore, and more likely than not, never will. Quit feeling sorry for yourself and move on. You aren't doing yourself, her, or anyone who has to put up with you any favors by hanging on the past. Go out, meet some girls, and quit using her as a benchmark to judge them. If she was such a perfect match for you, she wouldn't have left in the first place.

I felt this way about a girl once after she broke up with me. I can't even remember her last name anymore. Life goes on. I just wish I would have had a friend who just told me the truth and slapped me in the face back then.

I'll never forget this girl. Im not using her as a benchmark to other girls.. but knowing they don't even compare to her makes me completely not interested in them.

[tmc92ic]

Honestly, wtf can you do? You can't do anything to get her back, it doesn't seem like she loves you anymore. There is no point in being with someone who doesn't love you.

Just move on, find something to do. Go out and have a drink with some buddies. Take out a gym membership. Set some goals.. do anything you can to distract yourself for awhile. Over time things will fade, for some people it can be days, weeks, or even a month while for others it can take several months. The more you distract yourself and keep yourself busy the quicker it will pass.

Also don't think you'll never meet someone like her again. Fact is, a lot of the girls you brushed off recently comparing them to her could have been better than her. You think she is better because you know her better than you do this new girls. Get to know some of these new girls... who knows they can turn out to be a dozen times better than her. People don't just open up with all their love the first time you meet them.

[surfhb]

What do you mean?

Quitting your job

[Jhcl]

I broke up with a girl I had fallen in love with just three weeks ago. It was hard, and it still is. I'm trying to date; I WANT to date, but I'm not having the best experience. Each girl I don't connect with is just more and more disappointment.

We just need time, brother.

[ochriso]

Honestly, wtf can you do? You can't do anything to get her back, it doesn't seem like she loves you anymore. There is no point in being with someone who doesn't love you.

Just move on, find something to do. Go out and have a drink with some buddies. Take out a gym membership. Set some goals.. do anything you can to distract yourself for awhile. Over time things will fade, for some people it can be days, weeks, or even a month while for others it can take several months. The more you distract yourself and keep yourself busy the quicker it will pass.

Also don't think you'll never meet someone like her again. Fact is, a lot of the girls you brushed off recently comparing them to her could have been better than her. You think she is better because you know her better than you do this new girls. Get to know some of these new girls... who knows they can turn out to be a dozen times better than her. People don't just open up with all their love the first time you meet them.

You're right. I already have a gym membership though, feels impossible.

Thanks for the advice anyway.

I broke up with a girl I had fallen in love with just three weeks ago. It was hard, and it still is. I'm trying to date; I WANT to date, but I'm not having the best experience. Each girl I don't connect with is just more and more disappointment.

We just need time, brother.

Why did you break up with her?

[TigersFan]

I had to break up with my gf a couple months ago because I suspected she was falling for her former ex and I later found out she cheated on me. I still think about her every day, it seems like she is living happily and that drives me nuts because Im not happy. Though those things are true I know that I have to move on and just pulled together a span of about 5 days where I wasnt constantly down. It will come gradually but after a while Im sure you will be able to get your mind together and get over her. Forgetting her prob. seems out of the question right now, hell right now in my mind it seems I will never forget my ex, but thats not the point. You dont need to forget but realize that she wasnt the one.

[bulrush]

She did things that no other girl would do like turn up outside my work after I had a night shift at 7am with breakfast she made for me, she wrote me love letters, she never swore, she always treated everyone with respect, she's really intelligent and very pretty.

Wow. She really cared about you. And you really screwed up. I hope you don't do that again.

LDRs can be very hard. 90% of them do not work out because you actually need to see the person frequently to maintain that emotional bond. Next time, find a girl in town, even if it takes longer.

I know it feels like your world is ending, but your heart just needs time to fix itself. You'll find another person eventually, don't do it too soon though.