Why didn't we meet later in life?

[notforeveryone]

I am new here but i went quickly to the "broken hearts" section since that is precisely whats happening to me.
Some background info:
I am 22, she is 21. We both went to the same high school and started dating senior year.
She is smart, dedicated, and beautiful. I have always held two morals that i try to live my life by: Loyalty and Chivalry.
I am a quiet person in many ways and have been told that when i speak i say things i mean and that are profound, if i may.

I think we fell in love very fast and become attached. Our first real love relationship.
We finish high school out and then attend the same college close to our homes.--> Our first year of college was just us two. We hardly made any friends at school and would return to the city to party and hang out with our friends that either did not go out of town or were still in high school.
We were inseparable!
Skip forward a year or so----> She cheats on me with my best friend at the time.
I could not fathom it and was very close to ending it. She asked for forgiveness and i granted that to her. Lets face it, you can say you trust a person completely and when they do something to break that trust, you still say you trust them 100% but there is that underlying worry.....always.
I close the gap on all of my friends at the time (they were really worthless and were terrible influences).
We still go to school and lived together and then apart on and off for a few years.
The relationship had its ups and downs as most do but we still love each other very much.
Skip forward to now----> So this is now almost 5 years together through thick and thin. Partying and school. etc..
She tells me that she needs FREEDOM. Currently we are not living together and go to different schools but they are close in proximity. She does not know what she wants. She is very confused. This feeling she has came out suddenly and she wants to experience freedom. Not being accountable for anything.
At first i blame myself for the problem, she says that its not me (im perfect) but rather that it was a feeling in her that needed this to happen. I go through several days of depression, thinking, talking to friends and family. At this point a week has gone by and we are in a weird "limbo" of calling this a break.
She parties to numb her self while i "wait" and worry.
I finally say what the **** am i doing, i need to know what is going to happen to our relationship. This big QUESTION MARK is lingering in front of me. This strange break with no guideline or boundaries is beginning to irritate me. I contact her and let her know that this is unfair to me. She finally says that she is being selfish and is very confused. She does not want to confront the situation at all. I push for her to tell me her feelings and emotions but each time she is inconvenienced.
Almost two weeks now of this limbo and i have told myself that i NEED to let her go. We love each other very much. We both know that we should have met each other later in life. We are best friends first and then lovers. At our age we got WAY to comfortable and essentially we were a safety blanket for each other. We are going to talk face to face again in a few days (stress in school).
I have to let her go and i have almost accepted this. Perhaps fate will bring us back together. However for now i will store that in the back of my mind. The mind is a wicked wicked thing. I have really worked on myself for the past week and have grown stronger.
There is no other guy in her life and no other girl in mine so no worries their. I just cannot get over the fact that we dedicated almost 5 years to each other and now are going to just move on. I now know that this is for the best as we are young and have our life ahead of us.

I could have written a book but that might be too long for people to read. these are the basic cliff notes of our relationship. Things are missing but i really put in the important stuff even though everything is important. I am not really looking for advice as i have read a lot of stuff and done a lot of research on this matter. I just wanted to tell someone else.

Have you ever been in a relationship and wished that both of you would have met a little later in life? This was more of HER wish but i have also come to accept it.

[Cerby]

It sounds like she might simply be ready to move on. You spend a lot of time in your post speaking on her behalf, all things that she said that might not be completely true (people tend to say things to soften the blows of a failing relationship).

I think when you meet her in a couple of days, you should write down all the things you want to say, make sure they're said, and see if its salvageable. You need to go in with the mindset of having only 2 options. You either walk away as a couple, or walk away single.

There is no limbo - I've been there and its more damaging to you than anything.

[smackie9]

This why I say don't get involved in a long term committed relationship until you are in your late twenties. There is too much growing up to do before hand and well why miss out on being single during the best years of your life. Marriage is no picnic let me tell ya....it's better to wait for that as long as you can.

[notforeveryone]

Move on to what though? This whole thing came unexpectedly. I am a good person and have always treated her with respect and been their to protect her.
I believe that our lifestyles put some distance in the relationship. We started dating while we both occasionally did drugs and partied. Just in the last year i stopped smoking weed and drugs (more for school since i wasnt getting motivated). She could always balance everything so well.
Disclaimer: WE WERE AND ARE NOT DRUG ADDICTS.

However i said i didnt care and each time we went out to lets say a concert or something i would not have as much fun. She would say that i am NO FUN TO GO OUT WITH. I guess when i stopped smoking i got this superiority complex where i thought i was better than all of our social friends. I also took on the roll as "protector". In our group of friends everyone is careless (at least to me; i consider myself way more mature than anyone i know) so i am forced to make the correct decision and that puts alot of responsibility on me. you can see where this goes....some decisions i had to make may seem party-pooperish to someone who is partying hard.

Her roomate is also a very sad person who has way to much money and wants to live a crazy party lifestlye. She easily manipulates and buys friends. She is almost always single. I cant help but feel like this is also part of the problem. I have known this girl since my GF and i started dating. Crazy girl, nice but crazy.

LIFESTYLE CHANGES+CRAZY ROOMATE= feeling of wanting freedom. This is what i told myself was the problem but i cannot blame it on either. She defends her roommate and it is evident that we didnt share the same taste in getting f-ed up at concerts ( i like the music, but i dont take drugs).

These are small things that I THINK helped push her to this decision. She still loves me but wants to be free. We both do not know what freedom is like.

Thoughts?