Long story short, I cheated on him back in 09, we split up for 4 months(didn't see anyone while we were split up that I know of, I know I didn't) then got back together, things were going good, then in April of this year we split up again. This time he moved out and was seeing this girl that he said he had only been talking to the last time we split up, said he would never talk to her again. He dropped the bomb on me when he said the 2 of them have been talking ever since the last time we split in 09 and that when we were split up this year the 2 of them were dating and hooking up. While he was hooking up with her, he lied to me and said they never were so that he could still have sex with me. He again said he stopped talking her, but the last time he said that he didn't, but I could never prove if he did or didn't since he didn't use his cell phone, so I think he got another one. Well, again we are having problems and I asked him if he is talking to her again and he had this stupid smile that he uses when he is lying, but he says he isn't.
I don't know what to do, I am in between a rock and a hard place since I have been a stay at home mom for the last 4 1/2 years, I have only had 2 jobs and that totals a year I have worked in my life. He says he loves me and wants to be with me, but he says I have to show him I want him, by that he wants me to wait on him 24/7 and drop what I am doing when he asks, I have 2 kids, 2 years old and almost 4 years old that need me to wait on them, but he will kinda get upset when I say I need to do for them before him and if I say I need to do something for me, he looks at me like I am crazy. I can't ask for help because he just tells me since your a stay at home mom/wife that is your job to wait on me and the kids when ever, once in a while I get help with the boys, this is taking a toll on me, I feel worthless and always feel guilty if I don't do what is told to me, I am now on depression and anxiety meds to try to help me, because I feel like I am just being walk on, but with out him I am nothing and I am afraid for my kids, since me working isn't going to happen and my Dr. can attest to that.
Should I trust my husband that he isn't talking to the other girl again? Do any of you guys treat your wife/girlfriend like this and if you have kids, do you think it is solely the moms responsibility to care for the child?