Female Expert Analysis Needed!

[Gigabitch]

Don't fret, Grk. It's pointless. You did your part, now you just have to wait. She can't respond immediately- it's against the rules.

I'm glad you're going for the one you actually want. Everyone should have the balls to do this.

[boobaa]

rules? what rules?

[Gigabitch]

Basic dating rules that many, many people employ in an effort to make themselves look like higher-quality goods to prospective mates.

The "don't look desperate" rule is a big one for both genders, and part of that is making yourself not jump up and down like a spaz when a cute guy asks you out, but making him wait instead.

How long she makes him wait will be determined by a complex calculation taking into account how keen she actually is, how keen he appears to be, her self-perceived level of attractiveness and whether or not she was taught manners, among many other factors.

[GrkScorp]

Basic dating rules that many, many people employ in an effort to make themselves look like higher-quality goods to prospective mates.

The "don't look desperate" rule is a big one for both genders, and part of that is making yourself not jump up and down like a spaz when a cute guy asks you out, but making him wait instead.

How long she makes him wait will be determined by a complex calculation taking into account how keen she actually is, how keen he appears to be, her self-perceived level of attractiveness and whether or not she was taught manners, among many other factors.

Giga, thanks so much : )

I just woke up, logged on, no response yet from her end.. but your words were very comforting knowing they follow a logical sequence.. and I hope that's the case.. lol

As for the message I sent her.. i'm getting mixed opinions.. my lesbian friends say it was "perfect".. my strait female friends say "it doesn't leave any room or exit options, almost seems pushy".. and my guy friends say "I screwed it all up, because the message makes it seem like i'm an animal and she's some meat.. it's too intense"

I'd like to know what you guys think of the message.. I sort of came to terms with the fact that i'm stuck waiting.. it's the negative side of giving questions with no way of getting a "no" answer.. I just don't know how that message is really perceived, how someone could possibly take that message, and what effect it holds.. the guys told me it makes me look like an insensitive prick; I hope that's not the case..

[Gigabitch]

I thought it was cute, but I'm not easily bullied, so I would find the bossiness hilarious rather than threatening.

If she wants to say no, she still can. I don't think you've backed her into a corner or anything.

[GrkScorp]

I thought it was cute, but I'm not easily bullied, so I would find the bossiness hilarious rather than threatening.

If she wants to say no, she still can. I don't think you've backed her into a corner or anything.

crap.. it really came off as bossy? that wasn't my intention at all..

[Gigabitch]

Not in a bad way, really. I'd say it was in a challenging way.

If I got that offer, I'd think, "Skating, huh? We'll see about that. I think we're going skating, out for a nice meal, and after that, some fabulous cocktails. You want to be cocky, bring your wallet."

[GrkScorp]

You want to be cocky, bring your wallet

it's NY, and i'm a guy, so that's sort of taken as a given.. lol

interesting.. I take her to be this artist/creative person deep inside; but that's not the "mask" she wants to show the rest of the world.. so instead she hides under this "swinger/dancer/party animal" mask she puts on..

that being the case, I can almost guarantee a bit of an ego.. which is fine.. because my @ss is asking for it also.. alone on the holidays, bored out of my mind.. i'm more than up for any challenge at this point myself..

just hope you're right.. hope she took it as playful (Will Smith-ish), and not cocky, rude, or bossy..

[TheSphinx]

Not sure about the situation in your part of the world, Grk, but women in mine love a guy who can make plans and express that he wants her to come out with him rather than calling her and fumbling through the, "So, you wanna go out sometime?" routine.

Whatever response you receive, at least it will help you further gauge her personality versus your own.

Props to you for your assertiveness.

~Sphinx

[misombra]

my crystal ball says you're out.

[GrkScorp]

Not sure about the situation in your part of the world, Grk, but women in mine love a guy who can make plans and express that he wants her to come out with him rather than calling her and fumbling through the, "So, you wanna go out sometime?" routine.

Whatever response you receive, at least it will help you further gauge her personality versus your own.

Props to you for your assertiveness.

~Sphinx

same here.. in Greece, that's what a guy basically has to say.. and the woman usually says "get lost" if she's not interested.. or "yeah" if she is.. and it all takes place in one minute.. and that's the end of the story.. no delay time.. no games..

but NY is different, guys and girls both are wimps.. and people get startled and scared easily.. so maybe it was quite a shocker.. maybe she wants that "So I was kinda thinking, if you're not doing anything this weekend if you're free and you'd like to kinda sorta maybe go out for (insert innocent activity here)".. routine..

I don't get it.. lol.. i'll have to wait and see.. but thanks guys..

[vashti]

I agree that the way you did the inviting was fine... cute, even. It was assertive, and unless a girl feels like a perpetual victim, she isn't going to be put off by it.

[GrkScorp]

my crystal ball says you're out.

my leather ones agree..

[GrkScorp]

unless a girl feels like a perpetual victim, she isn't going to be put off by it.

totally!

this is how I get 18-22 year-old women to come out.. and they're supposed to be the more uncomfortable/less-mature ones.. they usually respond within two hours.. the latest (12 hours).. and if I catch them on the phone.. it's a "yes" or "yeah sure".. none of that "oh I don't know.. I'll have to see.. i'll call you back" non-sense..

for someone who's 25, mature, sure with themself as a woman.. this just doesn't make sense..

[celestialxs]

Sounds like she's not interested. I mean, I personally don't go by those stupid rules about making a guy wait.
To me, that's rude. She should have at least responded. If she's interested, but may have other plans she should have told you so.
Signs point to "no."