So happy to find this engaging forum! I was looking to see if I can find answers to my current dilemma online and came across this forum!
I am hoping that someone can advise or tell me what they think is going on.
My ex and I were together for about 3 years, we lived together for about 8 months. It was a good relationship overall - marked with some insecurity and commitment issues from him, but we were good to each other and clearly in love. He broke it off about a month before our engagement party (we had been talking marriage and love for a while) saying that though he loved me and would never forget about me, he can't go through with it. I was devastated after the break up but moved on and never contacted him or his family - not once. 7 years pass and he emailed me. Basically saying that he has thought about me constantly over the last 7 years and would love to be in touch. He has been through a terrible relationship, according to him with a woman he didn't really love. He didn't date other women immediately after our break up. I did respond to his message and finally met up and it was wonderful. We were both very happy to see each other and it has generally been very nice to be in touch. I have been very cautious. I don't call him and let him be the one to leave messages, etc. I am very nice, light and polite, and don't let on too much. Apparently he misses me and wants to be back in touch.
I am wondering why he is back? Is it because he needs a friend? After 7 years! We weren't in touch during those 7 years at all, so it's not like I am a part of his life. Is it for closure? Is it random? Is there more? I am trying not to be affected by him but can't help and feel some of the old 'feelings' for him. I am afraid that I might end of falling for him again and all he needs is a friend. Do men (or women for that fact) randomly get back in touch with someone after so long? Our relationship was intense and the break-up was very dramatic. I feel he is genuine but I am not sure if I should trust myself. I was 30 at the time of break-up and will be 38 next month - so I don't want to waste any more time. During this time that we were apart I was married for a short time and ended up getting divorced - he knows all about that and compares it to the relationship that he is getting out of. We seem to be at similar points in our lives.