Where do I begin? I am a 25 year old guy who is recently out of an 8 month relationship with a 20 year old girl. For starters I understand that she is young, but still mature for her age. Where 8 months doesn't seem like all that long, I have never felt the feeling I felt when I was with her. If I had to describe it in one word I would say it felt magical. I screwed up pretty badly in the relationship and hurt her unintentionally. It has been almost 2 months since she left me and a few things have happened since then. We have talked on and off since the breakup, mainly small talk. She had asked me to please come see her 2 weeks ago to talk about possibly getting back together. Upset over everything and being the stubborn guy that I am, I declined her offer and didn't speak to her until about 3 days ago. I texted her saying hello and we engaged in small talk, followed by a phone call. The call was going ok until she started bashing me over the things I had done wrong in the relationship. I listened to it for a while, apologized and then asked her if we could meet up for dinner one night and all she kept saying was "I don't know". At this point I lost my cool and did the unthinkable...I went on a rant and rave telling her how terrible of a person she is and said some very cruel and hurtful things to her. I also did a very immature thing and threatened that she would be attending my funeral (as a suicide scare). After this I hung up on her. Shortly after I got a text from her saying never to speak to her again. My effort to get her to care about me failed miserably and actually made her careless. Since then I have tried reaching out to her to apologize and admit to my actions being unacceptable. I have poured my heart out to her and told her how much I love and miss her through multiple texts, emails, and voicemails. She has told me that there is another man in her life who she grew up with that treats her like gold, but said they aren't dating. The last time I've heard from her was in a voicemail she left me earlier today. In a kind and sincere voice she asked me not to contact her in any way again and that she will decide if she needs to speak to me again. I have fell into chronic depression to the point where I stay in bed all day. I have lost all motivation to do anything with my life and constantly think of her and miss her. At this point I feel that I've lost her forever but can't seem to accept it. I would do anything to get her back and treat her the way she always deserved to be treated...But I feel like I have exhausted my options and that any further contact with her would be considered harassment. Does anyone have any ideas what so ever that would either A) get her back or B) somehow allow me to move on? Preferably option A. Please keep in mind that I have been in longer relationships prior to this one and none of them have inflicted this much pain and hurt upon me. She has blocked texts and incoming calls from my cell number so I am left with very little means of contacting her. I can't understand why she hates me so bad. We were always so loving toward one another. Please help. Thank you.