I have been widowed for several years. During this time I have dated a few men. Of the men I’ve dated one in particular was in a serious relationship. He wanted to marry me but I broke up with him a few times because I found him to be untruthful regarding his finances and he was irresponsible when it came to his money as well. I reconciled with him on a few occasions only to find that he couldn’t really change to the point that I had peace of mind. However I still love him and miss him - and I know that he feels the same because although I try to block his number and his email and any other way for him to reach me recently he tried reaching out to me through a game app that we always played together. I have not yet responded and do not believe it is my best interest to respond because it seems that I will just find myself back in the same position.
I met a second man over year ago and he is very considerate and cares about me. However I’m having issues with him too. When we first met during the first year, he was extremely attentive and generous and wanted to see me every chance he could. But that has mostly disappeared over the last 6 months. We even talked about living together and then the conversation dropped on his end. I have NEVER met any of his friends and only met his immediate family once other than his adult children. I, on the other hand, have introduced him and included him in all family and friend events (at least 8 of them). I recognize this is a red flag. He even mentioned a family event next weekend but still didn't invite me even after I suggested I'd be willing to go the area of the event - REALLY??
I am ready to be not only in an exclusive relationship but at least live with the person and start building for the future. I am also lonely. My current BF and I only see each other 1 night over the weekend due to his work schedule and b/c of the distance between us.
Perhaps because I can see the end with this guy, I went online to just "look" and connected with someone who is also out of town but within 2 hours of my home. We have spoken several times and I do plan on meeting him in a week (keep it casual).
Does anyone have any practical advice for me which I would greatly appreciate.