My heart feels ripped apart

[Superfantastich]

I am currently in a 8 month relationship with the man of my dreams, I wouldnt trade him for the world. Although for the last say 5 months he has been in a very difficult situation, his ex wife because of the divorce moved back to her home town (which is about 8 hours away) with their 3 yr old son. Before this he saw his son on a very regular basis but is now stripped down to calling him through the week and seeing him as hardly as often as he would like to due to his current poor financial situation. Just recently I have been feeling exceedingly guilty and hurt for this little boy who isn't having the opportunity to grow up knowing his daddy. I tell James regularly if he wants to move back up there to be with his son to not hesitate in the slightest as he should take priority over myself, but he has said that it was his ex wifes decision to move him so far away from himself and at this time he can only do what he can and physically cannot remove himself from myself as he feels he has met the "love of his life". He also said when his financial situation improves he will be visiting him on a much more regular basis but for now he can only do as much as he can. The big question in this is am I doing the right thing letting him stay here for me?, I love him more than anything but I feel if I had to step back for the sake of his son, I might have to. :'(

[hello1]

This is his choice, he can't base his whole life on what his ex wife does, he could move up there then she decides to move again so you can see his point? If he keeps moaning about the situation then I would think about leaving as he obviously be resenting you which is not fair.

[xxazurexx]

Unless you are actually forcing him to stay, which it doesn't appear you are, then why feel guilty? It's hardly your fault that his ex decided to up and move and he's told you that when his financial situation improves, he will be able to see his son more often. If he wanted to, or decides in the future that he would like to live nearer his son, would there be a problem that you move with him and if you are still very much together?

[Superfantastich]

At this time I would not as I have just started a uni degree, but when I graduate I really wouldn't have any issues with it

[Sunnybeach7]

You don't need to feel guilt. It is his choice, not yours. I'm surprised she was allowed to move so far away with the boy...I didn't think that was legal, and that if it was, she would have to pay for/provide for the boy to travel back and forth?

Also, doesn't he have equal custody? There should be arrangements that he has the child with him on a regular basis.