Why am i so soft?

[Plawboro]

Right folks, wound up here asking a bit of advice...

Me and my parter have been together for 8 years and have 1 child. We have had our ups and downs, but recently more downs..

To cut a long story short i have found out that she has been cheating on me around 3-4 weeks ago.. confronted her, she admitted it and i took her back.. over the last few weeks she has continually hurt me going back to this other guy..

It all came to ahead again at the weekend after she was with him again! She has now finished it with him.. supposedly.. i did see her send him the text etc saying she couldnt see him anymore..

Now i have just been to soft really.. i know deep down i cant trust her anymore, but i dont want to loose her at the same time, i love her too bits.. or at least i think i do. I think its the classic case of head over heart here, but i cant do it.. what the fook it wrong with me my head is all over... any help would be appreciated.

[Boisdevie]

The big question is why she had sex with somebody other than you? That has to be the starting point to this situation. IMHO it does not sound good.

[Plawboro]

No, thats why i need to let go.. i am just finding it difficult to do so is all :/

[Agape]

"i have found out that she has been cheating on me around 3-4 weeks ago.. confronted her, she admitted it and i took her back.. over the last few weeks she has continually hurt me going back to this other guy"

Wow dude . . . I suppose the only reason you allow this is for the child. . . is that child even yours?

"She has now finished it with him"

Lol, sure . . . nearly a month and then she's done . . .she should have been finished from the start

"i cant trust her anymore"

If you can't trust her then you don't have a relationship

[girl68]

I think with the support of your family and friends you CAN do it. You just need a little help.

You know that a relationship without trust, is over.

[Plawboro]

well i have done it again.. she told me we could get things back on track and i listend took her and our son for a meal this evening, put our son to bed, then she went all 'cold' on me and said she is confused and upped and left.

I have nobody to blame but myself for being so stupid and putting myself through this nightmare over and over. i just want things to be right, it seems she just wants to hurt me bah. i'm stupid :/

[IncognitoSir]

Since no one else said it, I'll say it. Man up, grow some balls, and calmly remove her from your life. You know where she up and left too? Maybe back to the guy, what you think? She using you like a door mate man. She's not worth it, and don't think for a second that all the years between you two will pull you through this situation. She's not "working" on anything. She's doing whatever she wants because she knows she can get away with it. When you kick her out and she begs you for another chance, just keep on moving.

[Agape]

"have nobody to blame but myself for being so stupid and putting myself through this nightmare over and over."

Meh. . . like a moth to a flame, no advice will help you . . you will keep on going to her until you burn yourself out