Female Phobia

[Henry123]

I have this terrible phobia of women. I cant even look into a women's eyes in the streets. It scares the hell out of me. My instinct is to run away runaway! Any advice on how to overcome it?

[King Zarathu]

Jesus dude... Umm.. let me ask just a COUPLE questions for clarity:

1) How old are you?
2) Are you (don't take offense to this, please) homosexual?
3) Have you ever been in a relationship and/or dating experience with a woman?

[vashti]

Practice talking to females for whom you feel absolutely no attraction - ones you consider a "1" on a 1-10 scale. When you find this becomes easy, start talking to "9s", and then "8s" and so on.

[Henry123]

Jesus dude... Umm.. let me ask just a COUPLE questions for clarity:

1) How old are you?
2) Are you (don't take offense to this, please) homosexual?
3) Have you ever been in a relationship and/or dating experience with a woman?

1)Eary 30's (being honest with you)
2) I'm attracted to girls but still scare to meet them.
3) When I was in high school I went out with a few girls in my classroom. I guess it was easier to meet people whom you sorta know. Never been in a relationship per say but gone to coffee with them. I'm general okay with conversation wise. When it comes to touching or being touch or when to kiss etc. I feel pretty anxious. I have a difficult time sometimes reading her body language. I have difficulties with projecting my own body language (unfortunatly I'm a very introverted person)

To be honest I should add that I also have a social phobia disorder. It makes my life feel miserable. I dont have a happy life.

[Henry123]

Practice talking to females for whom you feel absolutely no attraction - ones you consider a "1" on a 1-10 scale. When you find this becomes easy, start talking to "9s", and then "8s" and so on.

I tend to be abit phobic with people in general. Looking where to meet females in general is a challange to me. I lived a pretty sheltered life.

[vashti]

If you aren't willing to stretch beyond what you are comfortable with, you will NEVER get over it.

[Henry123]

If you aren't willing to stretch beyond what you are comfortable with, you will NEVER get over it.

I already know that.
Things are moving at a snail pace.

[King Zarathu]

Things are moving at a snail pace.

A snail pace is still a pace! I've never tried hypnotherapy but a lot of people say it works perfectly for situations like these. Give it a try. It's cheap and you only have to go about twice.

[nendo]

to me ur problem is being seriously sy. u havn't got a phobia towards them. u just to shy to interact i used to get dead nervous walking past a rowd of girls. i still do but not as much. i can't look anyone in the eyes at all. for long periods or time

[Henry123]

A snail pace is still a pace! I've never tried hypnotherapy but a lot of people say it works perfectly for situations like these. Give it a try. It's cheap and you only have to go about twice.

hymmmm Hypnotherapy?! I think I'll try that as well. Thanks for the suggestion.

[Gigabitch]

Henry, how's your relationship with your mother? Sorry to get all Freudian on you, but I'm really intrigued by your problem.

[Henry123]

to me ur problem is being seriously sy. u havn't got a phobia towards them. u just to shy to interact i used to get dead nervous walking past a rowd of girls. i still do but not as much. i can't look anyone in the eyes at all. for long periods or time

Thanks for sharing that.
I often dont know where to put my hands or my body language is stiff like a board when I'm speaking torwards others. I also not totally sure whats the meaning behind other people's body language.

[Henry123]

Henry, how's your relationship with your mother? Sorry to get all Freudian on you, but I'm really intrigued by your problem.

I'm okay with my mother. But she hasnt been well most of my life. My father was domineering and physical & mentally abusive. He beat up my mom and she became mentally unstable. I think she developed a bi-polar disorder and has these irratic mood changes. Theres alot of yelling & screaming and slamming & smashing things around the home. I do remember her when she was normal and use to walk me home from school and go shopping.

[Gigabitch]

She sounds like a more extreme version of my own mother- but IMO, my mother was unstable to begin with or she would have left him after the first beating, know what I mean?

Anyway, have you always been female-phobic? Did you ever connect with girls when you were a kid? And how are you with other guys- confortable, or pretty nervous?

[Henry123]

She sounds like a more extreme version of my own mother- but IMO, my mother was unstable to begin with or she would have left him after the first beating, know what I mean?

Sorry to hear about your mom. I'm glad that I'm not the only one who is in a similar situation (even if its not as severe as my mom).
I supose it was a different time back then. Divorces existed but wasnt as wide spread as we have today. I dont think there were that many social services for women. I think she also stayed for the sake of us (children).

Anyway, have you always been female-phobic? Did you ever connect with girls when you were a kid? And how are you with other guys- confortable, or pretty nervous?

See the strange thing is I'm pretty okay with girls in a class room. I didnt have problem with most girls when I was a kid. With other guys I'm alittle bit nervous when I first meet them. If I know them for a long time its not a problem.